A large part of this book will be about the attitudes - and the body of law that follows - that is prevalent with today's American woman, and the attitudes that are prevalent within today's American society. Again, it is these attitudes that, over time, has given a slow birth to the present body of American domestic and family law. Although these laws vary from state to state, the common goal among feminist lawmakers has been to offer the American woman a life where any choice that they make is for them, the right choice. Unfortunately, the costs for these choices, whether emotional or financial, do not just disappear into thin air. These costs are dumped onto the backs of men, children, and society itself...
The goal of this book is not to engender hate against the American woman. Nor is it the goal of this book to set you against the concept of woman's equality.
The goal of this book is to make you, mister,an enlightened man. The goal of this book is to make you much more aware of how American society has changed, and how women's equality has changed now to a kind of "over-equality"......
The goal of this book is to make you a smarter man. A man who has learned to tear his eyes away from the T&A and look at where her head is at. I want you to be a more discerning man, and I want you to look below this skirt and see where her bottom line is at. And, mister, you need to do this, in varying degrees, with just about every American woman that you meet, from the one night stand to your fiancé.
And now what about men? Men have not been liberated from anything. Indeed, a man "is not a man" unless he does some very specific things, such as earn a living, not so much for himself but for his children's mother and their children (in that order).He must not fight with his woman, but he must become violent on demand (to defend her honor). Failure to do either gets him the "you're not a man" epithet. A man is ranked, in society and by other men and women, by how much money that he makes......And while a man is not usually tasked with raising children, well he certainly has to pay for it. I have seen bums hauled in off the street, still stinking, sitting in court, and being charged with child support.
If we, as an American society, are going to move forward in the 21st century,we need to recognize that the progress of women and men in the present society has been uneven at best and a growing fault line between the sexes at worst. However, women, as a group, and most men, don't see any problem at all. In fact the only men, and a few women who see a problem are those who have run afoul of it through the divorce process and the separation from their children.
There are a million different reasons why a woman will go out with, and maybe sleep with a man, and a million reasons why they won't. The goal here is to separate out the calculating woman. Now, the calculating woman are, of course, not going to tell you what their plans are, but perhaps once the two of you get comfortable with each other, you can learn as much as you can about her. you may be able to read between the lines of the story that she has rehearsed for you.
Not only is she gathering information about you, she is sharing this information with her girlfriends, or her mother, or both. In effect, you, the man, are now faced with what is basically a committee. You might be having sex with one woman, but you might be dealing with the opinions of five women Indeed, your woman will discuss with her friends nearly everything that she has noticed about you. And at some point, the opinion of the alpha or most influential woman will matter to her more than your actions. This is why some women will give you their phone numbers but subsequently will not take your calls.
Think of it this way - just like how a group of men will get together and discuss this or that basketball, baseball or football player, a similar group of women have gotten together to discuss you.
Some of you guys might reason, well, I don't want to go through all of that; she's just my girlfriend. I can understand that. The thing is, that over time, any feelings that you might have for her may deepen, and you might begin to overlook, or make excuses for, the things that she does that would otherwise cause concern. Should the eventual marriage fail, guess who will be on the hook? You, the man. Seriously. In some states the man is liable for LIFETIME alimony. Do I have your attention now?
The number one reason for wearing a condom is to help prevent the transmission for sexually transmitted diseases. Nothing is worse than having one partner reveal to another that "I have an STD, and I gave it to you". Yet, morally speaking, there is no other way around this. You have got to tell her, or she must tell you, so that you both can get to a doctor and get treated. Never mind the relationship; this is your fellow human being.
Have something else to do with your spare time, and your life, other than worrying about women. You should have,or get, a hobby or a pastime or something that occupies your time in a positive manner. The reason for having something else to do is so you can have a mental "counterweight" to that not so successful pub crawl last night. Certainly, I am not saying that every night out will be unsuccessful or negative. But if it is, or was, you will have something to get into that will put space, time, and perspective between you and that night out.
Did you sign a prenup?? Did she sign a prenup? Would it be likely that you would lose the house? (Generally, yes, especially if there are children). What about alimony? (Depending on the state that you live in, and how long you are married, you may be liable for lifetime alimony payments in several states -- seriously). Please see the other, related chapters in this book.
A good divorce lawyer can, within an hour's paid time, frame for you a snapshot of just what your life might look like, after a divorce.
So, do you want to be the father? Do you envision yourself one day as the dad, raising a family? Do you like the idea of having one or two little ones at your side? Would you like a little toddler, a mini-me, whom you can pick up, cuddle, hold, and eventually show life to? (Don't forget the changing of the diapers) Would you like to be at the head of a warm and happy household, with maybe even dinner on the table? Did I leave out any superlatives?
Well, that world that I have described above actually belongs not so much to you, today's man. More likely, this world would belong to your grandfather. If you, mister, are to achieve any part of that idyllic world above, then you absolutely have to do your homework, as far as your spouse is concerned. That nineteen - seventies dad's paradise is possible to have today, but in the 21st century, it takes far more work than it did "back then". the good news is that most of this work is mental. Let me try and update your thought processes on fatherhood here......