This is a book intended to help people think two or three times before getting married. The book challenges the separation of societal romanticism from love and sex. The basic question is, Are you in it for sex or are you in love? Is it commitment or is it lust? The heart of the matter is one’s expectations. What we can bring into the marriage and what we are willing to commit to it are always in central focus. Crosby treats many of the usual and unusual challenges that we encounter whenever we join forces with a partner. This second edition includes a new chapter on traditional defense mechanisms. Passive-aggressiveness, dependence, obsessive-compulsiveness, and paranoia are reviewed as barriers to solid marital communication.