Shattered Lens
A Tale of Domestic Violence and Redemption through Love
by
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I sit quietly staring out of the window at the beautiful scenery as we ride across the causeway to the port. Seeing the ocean has a calming effect on my nerves. I glance over at fabulous Bayside in downtown Miami and see the skyline of the wonderful attractions and realize how little time I’ve spent enjoying the amenities in my own city.
We arrive at the port in twenty minutes. It takes another thirty minutes to get through the procedures for boarding. Finally we enter the gangplank and stop briefly to pose for the traditional picture.
Damon and Lonnie carry my bags to the cabin. My anonymous roommate has already been in the room and declared squatter’s rights by placing her luggage on the lower bunk. I look around the cabin and think, “Why didn’t I pay for an upgrade, a bunk bed?” I sigh.
"Just place the bags against the wall. I’ll unpack later. Let’s take a tour of the ship before departure.”
“This ship is beautiful," Renee remarks.
“It sure is. It’s a floating luxury hotel.”
Knowing that I might not ask strangers to snap my picture, I say in a commanding tone, “Let’s hurry! I want you to take lots of pictures of me on board in various locations.”
As we stroll from deck to deck, I think, “I wish that they were going with me. It's so obvious that I'm the one holding on; but this is one phase of my life’s journey that they cannot help. I'll have to do this alone.”
An announcement from the public address system interrupts my thoughts: "Attention all visitors. Please return to shore immediately. The ship is preparing to set sail promptly at 5:30 p.m. Thank you for being our guests."
"Ok everybody. Come quickly and give me a hug.”
Sensing my separation anxiety, Renee says, “Relax and have a good time."
I hurry to the upper deck to catch a glimpse of them and wave goodbye until they are completely out of view. I sigh as my thoughts quickly revert to my cabin mate. Will she be much younger or older; Black, White or Hispanic; friendly or reclusive?" It's time to meet her. I slowly return to the cabin.
Beth, a Jewish legal secretary from New York, is warm, friendly and a seasoned passenger. This is her fourteenth cruise. She dates one of the co-captains and sails often, using her vouchers, to spend time with him. We are the same age and have lots in common.
“Other than being in the room to shower and redress, you will practically have the room to yourself Mary,” she states.
I think, “Great!” I earnestly want to be alone so that I can concentrate. I have to find solutions to some major personal problems and I want to think clearly without being distracted.
After dinner, I'll look for a quiet spot on the lower deck where I can begin introspecting. I must get myself together without any advice from relatives, friends or the clergy concerning relationships and biblical interpretations, my two major areas of concern.
I don't wish to go on like this any longer. I’ve been looking at life through a shattered lens for too long. I must begin to see people and situations as they really are, not as I want them to be.
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About the Book
As a toddler, Mary sustains an injury to her left eye. In elementary school, she is diagnosed with a traumatic cataract caused by a shattered lens and is advised to always wear glasses to protect her better eye. Not wanting to be teased by peers, she disguises her impairment by wearing tinted shades of various hues. These camouflages affect the way she views life and alters her perception of people and events. Believing that everyone encountered would initially focus on her eyes, she limits her social interactions and becomes an avid reader.
After ending an abusive marriage to Chico, her high school and college boyfriend, and later identifying with the Hebrew Israelites, she decides to take off the colorful blinders and face life, with all of its complexities, clearly focused by going on a Caribbean cruise to reflect on her experiences in order to resolve the inner conflicts which led to years of unhappiness and deferred dreams. The Creation story in the book of Genesis guides her thinking as she desperately attempts to recreate her life by analyzing over thirty years of experiences in seven short days. It begins with her understanding the causes of her blurred vision and ends with an enlightened sense of self pride, purpose and spiritual awareness. Throughout this true adventure, she uses her visual impairment as a metaphor for the blindness she suffers as she journeys along life’s path.
The book is filled with tales of her family structure and social values; issues of marriage, domestic violence, infidelity, deception and divorce; the challenges of single parenting; the frustrations of religious persecution and professional discrimination; the disappointments encountered in attempts to establish friendships and develop intimate relationships; and finally the blessings of finding true love and restoring trust.
About the Author
A native of Miami, Florida and a graduate of Northwestern High in Liberty City, Mary Alice Beasley was mentored by her college educated older sister Elizabeth to read, question, explore, dream and then strive to become all that she imagined. However, her plans were derailed when she married a high school football quarterback who became a school administrator and prosperous entrepreneur. Her life spiraled into an abyss of despair and depression. Determined to get it back on track, she searched within for the strength that she often recognized in her mother to overcome the physical scars, the suppressed emotional pain and the guilt that plagued her daily. Feeling blessed and triumphant, she now dedicates her life to tutoring and encouraging young people to become positive, powerful and productive citizens.
She received her B.S. in Speech Corrections from Florida A&M University and her M.S. in Exceptional Student Education from Saint Thomas University while serving as an itinerant Speech and Language Pathologist in Miami Dade County Schools. She later incorporated Speak Easy Tutors, an academic tutoring and educational consulting service. To become a successful, knowledgeable, and financially literate entrepreneur, she attended Gold Coast and Eagle Schools of Insurance to obtain licensing as a life, health and annuity agent and Johnson Lipman Corporation in Boca Raton for her Series 6 credentials.
She is a charter member of the South Broward Alumnae Chapter of Delta Sigma Theta Sorority, Inc.; a member of “Sistah Girl Reading Club,” a group dedicated to supporting African American authors by purchasing, reading and discussing their works, and the “Women of Promise,” a local support network of positive professional woman.