Dare to Dream a Life Together

CHAPTER ONE Section Four - ANTONIA

A lot of us wanted to have a different life, flooded with adventures and new far away places, eventually leaving the village to find our true destiny. But, as life wants, we consoled each other knowing that none of us would really have left the family if not to get married and to have a family of our own... even staying in the same village after all.

As for me, Blackberry, I was counting on meeting a special man who would have succeeded in making me feel so special as to forget who I was and from where I came.

Sometimes, walking with my female cousins and friends from my house to the school of the nuns, the boys of our village and some from neighboring villages, would accompany us very politely, at distance, asking if we would contemplate going out with them to dance or to the cinema.

I remember that I was one of the most contended one because I had three suitors: one was rich but full of himself, another was less rich and very nice, but not the type to turn my head; and the third one was Bruno, the man that the others envied me for because even though he was the poorest one, he was the most handsome and was working in the city of Padova. Having a job in the city in those days meant the possibility every day to go out of our reality, the monotonous lifestyle of a countryside village. On top of that, at the end of the month one would receive a true salary and some bonuses.

Bruno believed he was very important because he grew up in a family of all women: seven sisters, his mother, a religious aunt and a few other cousins. They all treated him as a prince, since he was the only one to have a real salary.

He was standing so tall, with clean hands, velvet skin and eyes that made one believe everything. Although at first it seemed he knew more than anyone of us, that attitude was later revealed to be only his ambitious awareness to what was happening around the country. All of this made him irresistible in my eyes and my heart.

The daily newspaper immediately became his daily ritual, preparing him to interact with the public since the moment he transferred from the cargo service as brakeman onto that of passengers as tickets’ inspector (conductor). When the train used to pass through the “paesino”, all of us stopped beside the track to admire this huge piece of metal powered by steam technology. Bruno, who talked to me about a lot of ambitions and made me dream during those walks up to the school, would stick his head out for a sign and smile, and I dreamed of going far away with him.

One day, while on a bicycle delivering embroidered sheets to Mrs. Amelia, Bruno asked me if he could accompany me on his lunch break with the excuse to go to see his father, who worked as mason in a nearby town.

The road was the same one and I didn’t oppose the idea. Once we arrived at Amelia’s house, I told him that I had to enter alone. He asked then if he could wait outside for me. A bit shy and embarrassed, I didn’t answer. While Amelia was talking I thought about Bruno waiting outside. The lady asked why I was so distracted and why I was hurrying her to give me some other sheets to be embroidered. I finally confessed to her that a man did accompany me, and that he was waiting just outside. Amelia always felt she was like a mother to me, orphaned since childhood, and start to ask me a lot of questions, to which I very candidly answered, pleased about it. Also knowing him by the family’s name, Mrs. Amelia would have approved a serious relationship and even made me promise to consider her as “Comare” (Bride-Maid) to the possible marriage. From that day, Bruno followed me often down that road and I was happy of it because he was handsome, kind and charming.

He was the one who took me to the first “cinema” movie of my life to see “Gone with the Wind” with Scarlet O’Hara. I was so captured by this actress to the point that I saw myself as beautiful as her, with the curls so similar to hers, with the red cheeks and the lipstick on the lips.

The first time that I put lipstick on, the man that would have become my man, removed it from my lips with his fingers saying that only bad women wore it, but I didn’t believe him because my mother always put lipstick on before going out, and she was not certainly one of those. Therefore, the lipstick remained a main component of our meetings, one vanity of mine as a woman.

The days and the months passed by, while our relationship was only made of smiles, long walks, blinking of an eye, fleeting and yet inviting glances, but nothing else. No kisses or hugs because they were forbidden until the engagement day.

Bruno finally asked me for permission to talk to my father. I asked him what they would talk about and he said: “This is a thing of respect among men because I want to be your only suitor.” Bruno had already socialized with my brothers a lot. He was a clever man, lending them his bicycle to go to their appointments with the girls, and was winning their trust as possible brother-in-law.

It seemed that nobody wanted to know my opinion about this matter. In fact, my interest in him was so obvious, for that “simpaticone” (likeable), handsome, interesting, with such seductive eyes and smile, that my opinion wasn’t even an issue to myself anymore.