A Stroke of Love

First-person accounts of medical crises are often page-turners, but also can offer meaningful Advice from the trenches to anyone similarly afflicted. Author Darlene Chissom aims for both as She recounts her husband Phill’s stroke and their first year of recovery together in A Stroke of Love, a tough, but moving, account.

Chissom writes from the heart, and her grief and joy come through on each page. There’s a brief collection of advice for caregivers at the end of the story; anyone who has cared for a loved one will recognize the tips there as spot-on and helpful. A short chapter about the family’s cat, a holly terror much of the time who can nevertheless sense when Phill is upset and offer emotional support, is a touching tribute to the human-animal bond.

A Stroke of Love is frank about the challenges inherent in caring for a spouse, but it offers reason for hope and perseverance. It’s also a plainspoken and eloquent story of family love.

Stroke of love is a warm and hopeful personal account of how a couple was able to overcome an unanticipated medical challenge.

The book relates mundane activities, such as going to the movies and finding ways to sleep in the same bed together again, as well as monumental and emotional occurrences, like the couple being forced to sell their dairy cattle and Phill breaking down and saying the he wished he had died. All events are written in a matter-of-fact way¬---never sentimental, but always with an eye on the positive. This makes what could have been a depressing account one with an overriding feeling of hope.

Throughout the book, Chissom calls on her faith for strength, relying on her ability to see the silver lining in any situation. Her straightforward style means that heartbreaking issues are conveyed with no sense of self-pity.

Her love for her husband and her resiliency shine through on every page, as she examines the highs and lows of the couple’s new means of living, loving, and expressing themselves in their new circumstances. Practical details of the changes that they had to make mingle successfully with more emotional issues.

Chissom’s husband, Phill, an upstate New York dairy farmer all his life, reveled in the long hours and demanding physical work; he especially loved his cows. He and the author, a professional photographer, had been married for almost 30 years and together raised their blended family when he was felled by a stroke that compromised the left side of his body. Fortunately, Chissom was home at the time and secured immediate emergency care for him: “When the specialist looked at the MRI, he could not believe” Phill was still able to somewhat walk and talk. After three days in the ICU, he was transferred to a regular room and, a few days later, to a rehab facility. Twenty-three days after his stroke. Phill was cleared to go home. Now that he had survived the initial danger, the real challenged began---both physically and emotionally. Physical therapy continued on an outpatient basis, but there were also psychological issues to deal with---anger, feelings of vulnerability, sadness, and fear. Most difficult of all for Phill was the decision to sell his beloved dairy cows. The reads much like a diary; sections are titled “Day 1,” “Day 2,” etc., although considering the frequent use of past tense, it appears to have been written from memory and/or notes rather than taken directly from journals kept at the time. Either way, the format effectively brings readers through the ordeal moment by moment, obstacle by obstacle. Chissom’s prose is pleasantly chatty, filled with anecdotes that are an inspiring testament to the author’s daily commitment to her full participation in Phill’s recovery process. In addition, the work includes a tender, encouraging, addendum from Phill.

An intimate and loving account that should be comforting and helpful to those dealing with a similar health situation.