Love, Luck or Miracle

          It has been four long and extremely emotional months since that almost fatal Saturday morning in April. During that time Derek has struggled and stumbled to find his way through the foothills of a mountain he once believed was far too high to even contemplate its ascent, but now with the help of a wonderful medical team, the caring and encouragement of his nurses and what I believe is mainly through his own steely determination, he is successfully well into the climb.

           Nevertheless there have been times when Derek’s fears of failure were very nearly proved to be justified, times when the climb became too arduous and he was no longer able to maintain his grip or keep his footing. The afternoon of Wednesday 25^th July was such a time. He tried to explain how he felt as though he was careering in freefall down a rock face too sheer to offer any hope of salvation. He went on to further explain how desperately tired he was feeling at the unrelenting effort it was costing him each and every moment waking moment and of how he felt he could no longer carry on.

           I sat quietly listening to him and in my mind’s eye I saw before me the image of Derek clinging by his finger tips to the side of the mountain with a look of sheer terror showing on his face as though he were about to lose his grip. I was about to lean forward to beg him not to give up, to plead with him to keep on but something held me back as I found myself looking in horror as the image before me changed and I realized that I was looking at not only the sheerest of rock faces I had ever seen but also the steepest which stretched endlessly above him. I looked in disbelief at a rock face as smooth as silk with not the slightest indent for him to place a foot or take a hold of. I found myself lost for words, for this image was showing me that this mountain was indeed too steep and impossible for Derek to climb.

           There appeared to be no way, yet I knew there had to be one. There had to be. I could not allow this wonderful man sitting before me to simply slide into a dark abyss. I struggled to find the words, knowing that as I spoke they would not be capable of lifting him up high enough to clear that sheer rock face I could not remove from my vision. Derek kept apologising for feeling so weak but could do nothing to ward off the feeling of exhaustion which seemed to be over powering him. It was at this point he actually told me he felt he was losing his grip and feared that he was about to lose the fight.