The first taste of 

alcohol

“You go in”, “no, why don’t you?”.. None of us were keen,

All  gathered  outside the off licence,deciding who looked most eighteen..

After much debate and shouting,all  agreed the job was mine,

And I entered feeling nervous..don’t let on it’s your first time!..

The man stared at me strangely,then finally asked me “what d’ya need?”

And I replied with voice quite wobbly while controlling knocking knees..

“two bottles of that  cider and a pack of ten silk cut.”

And as he put them  in a  plastic bag I could hear my mother tutt.

I exit from the offy,with a smile from ear to ear,

And am greeted like a hero,as my friends let out a cheer.

So we turned up at the party with our bottles held so proudly,

 “can’t believe the neighbours don’t complain,the music’s being played so loudly.”

But after a few hours of swigging cider in that din,

My palms became all sweaty and my head began to spin.

And a half an hour later,need a bathroom,need it quick!

But I had to join the queue outside,please hurry I feel sick.

Another hour passes and I’m laid out on the grass,

When this spotty  youth approached me, “wanna dance?”..”No thanks,I’ll pass!”…

I stumbled to my feet,I must go home, it’s twelve o two,

That’s the  last time that I ever drink!..

(but of course that wasn’t true!!)