Guide to Self
The Beginner’s Guide to Managing Emotion and Thought
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"Guide To Self: The Beginner's Guide" Voted Best Self-Help Book of 2007 by East Bay Express!
At the age of 27, while working towards my Ph.D. at U.C. Berkeley, I found myself in charge of the psychological needs of a middle school of 600 students. I was testing and diagnosing students as fast as I could. Another part of my job was running counseling groups for troubled students.
At every school I worked, I was given the boys with the worst behavior problems in the school. One middle school group was made up of eight boys each of whom was roughly 12 years old. I saw them once a week and chatted with them about things they liked to talk about. I created a connection with them. We had a rapport.
Middle school is interesting because the social hierarchy is so clearly formed by the age of 11. There is a pecking order. There are the cool kids, the geeks, the outcasts, the skaters and so on. And even within this group of 8 boys, there was a pecking order.
The student at the bottom of the pecking order, let’s call him Todd to preserve his anonymity, was the most impulsive of the lot. Todd couldn’t stay in his chair, couldn’t keep his body still for more than 5 seconds. He had no social skills. He was frequently involved in fistfights with other kids because his mouth would go in motion before his mind caught up. He’d insult a bigger, older student and wind up getting the snot beat out of him every week. The other students teased him mercilessly causing a gradual build up of anger within him.
Now when I run a group, I try to give these students a different response than what they typically get from adults – anger, contempt, and punishment. So I try to be relaxed, calm, and authentic.
One day, I was running the group as usual and the boys were more stirred up than usual. Todd, in particular, was agitated and wound more tightly than normal.
Towards the end of the hour, for some unknown reason, Todd sprung out of his chair, hopped the table and ran towards me. As he closed on me, he made a fist and took a swing at my face. I did not make any attempt to stop him. Todd’s fist stopped an inch from my nose. Apparently, he had some self-control after all.
I turned to the group and asked them, “Okay, now what just happened?” The boys were stunned. It took a few minutes to get anyone to say anything. Eventually, one boy said he saw Todd take a swing at me and I did not respond. He said he had never seen anything like it. In his world, anger was always met
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About the Book
"Guide To Self" just voted "Best Self-Help Book of 2007" by East Bay Express! In an engaging and humorous manner, "Guide To Self", offers the best scientific research from the top universities throughout the world sharing the latest proven techniques to manage your thoughts and feelings. "Guide To Self" is the first step on the quest towards a life of happiness using the latest in positive psychology. Emotional management is the basis of a contented and successful life. Happiness begins with emotional management skills. Everything else follows from the well of emotion. The goal of life is happiness. Happiness begins when you learn the fundamentals of feelings. Emotions are the foundation of everything you say, think and do. Emotion is intertwined with every thought you have. “Guide To Self” puts forth a radical new model of emotion. There is much more to you internal emotional landscape than you realize. The goal of this book is to show you how to become happy, how to master your feelings, thoughts and actions. Find out about the four types of anger, the five types of forgiveness, and powerful ways to manage your emotions and thoughts. This book will help you expertly maneuver through the internal landscape of your mind. Visit our sister sites at Guide To Self or Infinet Assessment.
About the Author
Dr. John Schinnerer has a Ph.D. in psychology from the
Dr. Schinnerer founded Infinet Assessment, a psychological testing company in 1997. The new methodology he developed looks at emotional IQ, traditional IQ, ethics, personality traits, and knowledge. This methodology was shown to reduce turnover at UPS by 34%. He is an expert in the evaluation of those competencies necessary for successful job performance. His areas of expertise include uncovering traits necessary for success in the workplace and life, psychological assessment, leadership development, business communication, emotional intelligence, and corporate culture.
Dr. Schinnerer is also President of Guide To Self, a company dedicated to improving our mastery of our body, mind, spirit and relationships. Guide To Self revolves coaching groups and individuals the best practices for mental, physical and spiritual well-being which speaks to both the emotional mind and the rational mind.
Check out the websites at Guide To Self.com (personal coaching and speaking engagements) and Infinet Assessment.com (psychological testing for corporations). Or call (925) 944-3440 for the best emotional enter-"train"-ment of your life!