CHOICES

Riding along, staring out at the passing countryside as the bus made its way mile after mile, Dana had an uneasy feeling. It wasn’t anything particular she could put her finger on.  Apprehension hit her as soon as she entered the dorm room.  Victoria wasn’t there.  Perhaps, she’d gone home to visit her parents.  To Dana’s disappointment, Mr. and Mrs. Carlton hadn’t heard from Victoria.  Dana really began to worry then.  The two hadn’t spent more than a couple of days apart since they started school without touching base with each other, even when they went home on holidays and breaks.  They had a pact to always look out for each other.

     “Out of sight does not necessarily mean out of mind,” she often teased Victoria.  “You pick up that phone and call me if you’re going to be late. Don’t let me have to call out the posse to look for you.  I do believe you’d run wild if I weren’t around to pull your reigns and keep you in check.”

     Dana would tease but truth be told, Victoria did have a wild, down side to her.  Dana recognized that the very first day they met.  Dana always felt Victoria was keeping something locked away inside.  So what?  Who didn’t have a few skeletons in the closet hidden away from the eyes of the world?  Dana chose not to pry or ask any embarrassing questions.  Looking back, she wished she had asked.

     Dana often wondered about Victoria’s secrets, though.  What must it have been like for her growing up in a black world with a white face?  Not being accepted by her black sisters and brothers and shunned by her white heritage.  Torn between two worlds, yet, not belonging to either.

     On her way back to her room, Dana heard a siren.  That wasn’t unusual.  Sirens were always racing by.  She continued on down the hall.  The siren grew louder.  Suddenly, it stopped.  Dana entered the room and went straight to the window.  Red and blue lights were flashing across campus near the language arts building.  Dana stood still, frozen to the spot. 

     “Victoria.”

     The name escaped her lips in a faint whisper.  Something touched deep within her soul as the crimson and royal colors riveted across her face from the distance.  Victoria was an English major.  She spent a lot of time in the language arts building with her advisor,   Mr. Haynes, who wrote freelance articles for the local black newspaper.  Victoria had dreams of becoming a journalist.

     Dana can’t remember how long she stood staring out the window.  Time seemed infinite.  Then, she began to move mechanically.  She put on her jeans and grabbed her jacket from Victoria’s closet.  Dana stood still again, staring down at the red, black and green jacket in her hand.  Victoria loved her red, black and green jacket.  Said it made her feel her blackness.  Dana always smiled when she made that statement.  Victoria was forever trying to prove her blackness.

     Outside in the crisp, night air, Dana threw the jacket around her shoulders and headed in the direction of the lights.  She clutched the jacket to her breast.  She could still smell Victoria’s scent.  An unsettling quietness had replaced the siren’s shrill.  It was after midnight, she was alone, and there was a slight chill touching her face as she made her way across the campus.  Every step she took brought her closer to the culmination of events that would affect her life forever.  Only, she didn’t know it at the time.

     Dana rounded the corner of the building just as the emergency technicians were bringing the gurney out of the back door.  A still figure lay covered with a white cloth.  The gurney got caught on the last step.  The EMT lifted it higher to free the wheel.

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