Daddyhood
A brief guide for the new-father-to-be
by
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Introduction
I’m the greatest Dad in the world. I’ve got 3 hats, four coffee cups, 1 beer stein, 6 t-shirts, and dozens of birthday and holiday cards that say so. Don’t worry; you’ll get your share.
I improvised the word “Daddyhood” in a fit of cuteness; kids will do that to you.
They’ll also make you want to rip out (the rest of?) your hair.
But the good days overwhelmingly make up for the bad days.
When I was 23 and we were having a baby, I was completely clueless. Now, 18 years and four children later, I’ve learned a few things, and am only occasionally clueless. Objective observers (that is to say, people who would otherwise derive pleasure from telling me that my kids are brats) have told me that I have unusually bright, well-mannered, well-behaved children.
Most of that is my wife’s fault. She’s full of common sense, intelligence, and has read more child-rearing books than I will ever see or count. She also happens to have a degree as a medical assistant in pediatrics. So, she knows a lot (and cares a lot) about kids.
Over the years, I’ve learned a lot as well; both from observing and rearing my own and from observing and watching other people make what I perceive to make mistakes in dealing with their own children.
I’m not saying I’ve done everything perfectly, but hindsight is 20-20, right? That’s life. We all make mistakes. It’s part of being a parent. Some people want to avoid making the mistakes their parents did (and often realize that they weren’t mistakes after all). Others simply want to be good fathers (and mothers).
Well, knowledge is power. Most of child rearing is common sense (which is not always so common). But, since we can’t always see the forest for the trees, sometimes we need to know the basis for the common sense we’re about to take advantage of.
The idea behind this book is to let you, the new father, know what to expect; what these new words are that you’re going to start hearing; and to offer advice. You will of course decide which advice to take, because you’re the daddy. But I’m going to try to give you some new information upon which to base your decisions.
This book is arranged into sections. At the beginning of each section is the broad advice I want to give on a particular topic; this is followed by some detail, stories, and mostly-true anecdotes. The sections are: Her pregnancy (including the delivery), your newborn baby, and the transition from baby to toddler. As a new dad, if you get all this, you’ve got a heck of a head start.
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About the Book
When my wife told me she was pregnant with our first child I was scared down to my socks. I didn’t know the first thing about babies. What’s a layette? And why does my wife want to buy one now? What are we going to do with all the pink dresses when we have a boy? Which end of the baby do you diaper? Why won’t it (No! He or she!) Stop crying? And why does my wife keep talking to me like I should have known these things since I was 5? (Because boys usually don’t!) Why is she shopping so much when the baby isn’t even due for 6 more months?
If you’re like I was when I was first a daddy, and want to avoid some of my mistakes, and take advantage of some of the things I’ve learned, this is the book for you. While it’s not all you need to know from conception through toddler years, it’s a good start.
About the Author
Jeff has a bachelor’s degree in computer science, and has written over a dozen technical books, none of which prepared him for fatherhood. His qualifications are mostly: Four great kids, a remarkably understanding wife, and a slightly twisted sense of humor. He’s simply a guy who wants to help other guys from stumbling around the way he did.
Penny is the world’s most understanding wife. Like many women, she has the instinctive ability to know what the right thing is for her children. Unlike many women, she has a degree as a Medical Assistant in Pediatrics to add credence. Fortunately, she also has the patience to show her husband how not to ruin a child.
Dr. Greene is a pediatrician with a large multi-site group practice, Pediatric Healthcare Alliance, in
She is happily married to David, her husband of twenty years. They have four daughters, ages six to seventeen. David has always been intimately involved in raising their children and has truly enjoyed both the fruits and labors of Daddyhood.