Robin’s Gift

Natalie gestured toward the envelopes. “I haven’t spoken to them in years. I tried as hard as possible to move beyond everything that represented my past, even Robin and Melody, my two best friends. Yet, lately, I cannot get them out of my mind.” “Of course, you can’t, honey. That would be like denying yourself. Your past created who you are today.” “But it is all so painful.” A recollection of the blazing fire from last night’s purge flashed through Natalie’s mind. “You cannot stop pain by running from it. The only way to heal is by facing that enemy head-on. Look at Harold. Why do you think he is so cranky? He spent the past sixty-odd years evading himself.” Lucy patted Natalie’s hands with her own soft, withered ones. “No matter how long or far a person may run, they will never escape who they truly are. Now tell me, dear, is it those two girls you have the issue with?” A tremor vibrated in Natalie’s sternum. “No, they have been nothing but wonderful. My parents are who I don’t want anything to do with.” Lucy’s wide eyes spoke clearly, encouraging Natalie to continue. “My father controlled everything, including my mother and me. She obeyed whatever he told her to do, even beating me at his instructions until I bled.” A shutter shot up Natalie’s spine. Overcome by shame, she turned from Lucy and stared out the window. “My mother showed no empathy as that fragmented board continuously struck against my body, leaving cuts and bruises, covering my back and upper arms. The next day was so hot I wore a short-sleeved shirt to school, but it revealed the marks. A teacher noticed and reported me to the child protection agency.” Natalie blinked away a glare cast by an outside streetlight, then directed her sight back onto Lucy. “Authorities removed me from my home shortly after that day. I never told anyone I was going away. Not a soul. Not even Robin or Melody.” A look of compassion swarmed within Lucy’s cloudy-blue eyes. “So, honey, where are you on forgiveness toward your parents?” “They have not changed. My mother and father still engage in the same behaviors that caused the state to remove me from my parent’s custody when I was fourteen.” Natalie heard anger resonate within her voice. “I see . . . You haven’t worked on healing yet, have you? Instead, you’ve exhausted yourself running.” Lucy’s arm shook as she pointed down toward Natalie’s feet. “Oh, you must have worn holes clear through the bottoms of those soles by now. Dearie, no matter how far you run, you will never find freedom until you forgive. But first, you must face what you are fleeing. It seems like Robin and Melody might provide a safe platform from which you could face your past.” A battle of emotions clashed within Natalie’s head. “If I send out these cards . . . What if they don’t want to hear from me?” Lucy’s smile lines plumped her pink cheeks. “Why wouldn’t they? You said they were your friends.” “They were, but I abandoned them. The same as my family had abandoned me.” “I am not convinced fleeing to find a better life would qualify as abandonment to your friends. Sometimes, life takes people down different pathways. That does not mean you care any less for them. If they are truly your friends, they would celebrate your return.” “Could they ever fully forgive me?” “I do not know much of your story—however, it sounds as if having their forgiveness is not the real issue. I perceive you are the one who needs to forgive yourself.” Tears pooled in Natalie’s eyes, spilling toward her chin. Lucy grabbed a tissue and dabbed away the moisture with great tenderness. “So much has happened since I last spoke to them. I am not even certain where they now live.” The side-to-side motion of Lucy’s head revealed that she did not buy it. “Oh, you are a smart one. I know you can overcome that obstacle with a stint of research. Do not let insignificant things stop you from moving forward.” Rightfully chastised, Natalie stood up, leaned over, and kissed Lucy on the cheek. “Thank you. Whenever I need a pick-me-up, you always know exactly the right thing to say.” Natalie walked from the room as cleansing peace washed over her.