Beyond the Frame

“Good thing it’s down. You need the blood back in your head,” Rebecca hisses. “I knew it! I saw you wiping your ring on the sheets.” Rebecca remembers the scene from her dream and a passage from Denver’s journal, hinting at how she was in the dark about the family’s crisis. “How can you do this to me? How can you do this to your son? This is the second time he’s seen you! He’s in therapy and you put him through this! Do you want to tear this family apart?” Rebecca says as she circles her husband. Peter just sits with his back to the bed. His left leg is laid out in front of him with his right knee bent to his chest as his arm rests limply on top of it. “LOOK AT ME!” Rebecca screams at her husband. “I SAID, LOOK AT ME!” “You don’t want me to look at you,” Peter whispers regretfully. “Look at me,” she says as she grits her teeth. Peter slowly raises his head. “Why?” Rebecca asks desperately. Peter wipes his palms down his face. “I don’t know.” “Does she look better than me?” “No.” “What is it?” “Babe, it has nothing to do with all that.” “Is she better than me?” Peter looks up at his wife with furrowed brows and shakes his head “no.” “Just tell me Peter…I’m really hurting here.” “I’m hurting more than you.” “Oh, she doesn’t know how to ride you?” “Rebecca.” Rebecca looks at her husband with wounded eyes, tears welled in her bottom lids. “What would you do with her?” “Rebecca you don’t want to hear that.” “Yeah I do. Would you do everything you do with me, or you do more?” “It’s different; that’s all I’m going to say. It’s just going to make you more upset.” Rebecca’s chest heaves in irate grief. She stares at her husband again. “How long has this been going on?” “It’s been about two months.” “Two months!” Rebecca laughs in desperation. “I’m like a stranger to my own life. The wives are always the last ones to know right?” “You knew when Denver told you. You’ve been giving me the cold shoulder.” “You knew when Denver told me?” Peter nods his head. “I still remember how I glowered at him that night. You wanted to ask me; but, you were too scared to find out. I knew I hit a low at that point. That kid idolizes me, and I let him see his old man like that…” “You need to apologize to him.” “I will,” Peter says as he gets up for the first time. He walks toward his wife. He is about to wrap his arm around her waist, but Rebecca moves away. “I’m sorry to you too. I love you Rebecca.” “So much so that you’re banging your mistress in my bed.” “I know this is all going to sound like bs to you, but you don’t know how tormented I’ve been. I strain to look at myself in the mirror. I’m not trying to make excuses, please believe me, but you know how I am —” “I know.” “I’ve been controlling it these last few years, being able to put my energy into the research; but, it changed when she came around. It didn’t start out like that. We were just working on projects and studies; and, she impressed me from the start. She’s so smart, and dedicated… I fell. I’m sorry.” Rebecca sighs. “It just had been so long Rebecca, and she was there... I’m not trying to excuse it, I’m just trying to explain and make sense of everything myself. I never, for the life of me, ever thought that I’d be the one of the guys to do this. I’m so sorry.” “I didn’t either.” Tears beat down Peter’s face. He buries his head in his hands for a few moments. He manages to look up at his wife after collecting himself.