Living Out A Dream

Just off a busy freeway in a small town in Michigan a thirteen-year-old boy named Appy Olsen will soon come into manhood. In the town where he lives, the landscape is very morainic and beautiful. Exiting off the expressway there are many motels where vacationers heading north often stop for a night’s sleep. Deeper in the town the streets are lined with large, old Victorian period homes with overgrown oak trees everywhere. Crossing the railroad tracks and down the main street at the far end of town is a brick and gated enclosure that leads to a large church, adjacent school, and an orphanage all nestled on an acre or two of land. Beyond that, acres of land, where West Branch families do their farming to supply St. Matthew and the town folks with fresh, wholesome food. Appy’s mother abandoned him at birth. The orphanage was the only life he knew. Although he had many friends who came and went, and children of all ages who coexisted with him at the home, a loneliness certainly persisted throughout his childhood. Oftentimes, the older teens teased the younger boys relentlessly while the younger boys had two choices…toughen up or run fast. Appy could run fast that’s for sure. Fortunately he had a favorite nun, Sister Jenny, who comforted him through troubled times, but ever so often he was silly and boyish enough to wear even her down. Still, whenever he did something wrong as a young child Sister Jenny would kiss him on the forehead and say, “Appy you’ll do better tomorrow.” Appy would always reply, “Yes, Sister Jenny I want to do better tomorrow.” In his younger years, he wasn’t quite sure just what constituted a mischievous act, but he thought Sister Jenny to be very pretty. He also could feel her love for him. Father Jeff, who headed St. Matthew, often related stories to Appy about the happenings in his childhood. Like the time he found a snake outside on the playground at school, put it in his pocket, and once inside the classroom began to whirl it atop his head hissing and yelling, “Watch out this rattle snake has a hold on my thumb!” The story went that he stomped his feet. Started giggling wildly as the whole class and Sister Angie went screaming down the corridor and out the entrance door. Of course, Appy was marched down to Father Jeff’s office by Father Larry who patrolled the school halls for any disturbances. “Father Larry told me that you moped all the way down the hall trying to plead your case. Repeatedly you argued, ‘What’s so scary? It’s only a garden snake.’ When you entered my office Appy, you still had the snake in your pocket. You seemingly didn’t want to get rid of it and made it known, ‘It’s small and cute. I really want to keep it.’ I had to remind you that I could see the snake had its head poking out and hissing. I said, for heaven’s sake Appy put that snake outside. After you released the snake, I pointed my finger at you declaring, one more time my fine fellow, you’ll find yourself in deep trouble.” Father Jeff loved to tell Appy these stories, “As punishment you had to make up beds in the girls’ dorm three mornings in a row. Sister Angie could hear you mumbling, ‘Sissy girls. Who needs em?’ She also stood by the door with her hands on her hips seeming to enjoy seeing you punished. You can understand that now can’t you? I related to you that the punishment was because I didn’t appreciate all the little girls clinging on my arms crying and shaking. Looking to me to console them and keep them safe. Because there were so many little girls, that was an awesome situation that you put me in. Of course, at that time, I needed to make a few things clear to you Appy. Insisting that you keep your bed neat, your dorm orderly which you were remiss about, and to keep snakes outside where they belong. After that, you never brought anymore reptiles into the classroom. Not-to-say there weren’t other irritating events where you needed to be gently disciplined.” Appy liked reminiscing with Father Jeff as well. “I remember asking you what happened to the hair on top of your head? You chuckled saying, ‘Someday you’ll understand.’ But in my younger years, I related things to my own experiences. I was pretty certain that Sister Angie and the girls probably lost a few hairs the way they acted over snake events. I thought that maybe a poisonous snake scared the hair clean off your head.” Father Jeff found Appy’s memory of events interesting since he was probably only six years of age. Also extremely funny since his hair thinned when he was fairly young. He had made peace with that awhile back. Appy enjoyed the evenings in the residence. He thought they were the very best. First, everyone would complete their homework. Then all enjoyed movies. The younger children watched their animated cartoons. The older children watched something more compatible to their age. Sister Eunice was in charge of entertainment. She was very good at planning events being always open to new ideas. She was known to separate the children in the gathering room according to age and preferences, so as to allow each age group to choose an activity of interest to them. The little ones stayed up until 8:00 p.m. Often falling asleep while watching such movies as “Bernie the Alligator.” The older boys carried them off to their beds inevitably upsetting the girls by placing their movie on pause. The older children usually stayed up until 10:00 p.m. At that hour, they were usually tired out giving no resistance to the nuns. Being somewhat sheltered Appy felt he learned much about the outside world from the movies he watched. He enjoyed the winter months in West Branch often building snow borders on the lawn, filling it with water, and waited for it to freeze. When the ice was just right, he played hockey with the younger boys. Something he enjoyed a great deal. The summer months were filled with picnics and games of baseball. The Sisters often took the children to the zoo. The older girls and boys helped watch the younger ones. Even though Appy was a teen he still enjoyed the zoo animals, especially the elephants. He was good about helping the Sisters with the young ones because he really enjoyed their innocence. When Appy turned fourteen, his voice began to crack. Even Father Jeff would tease him about the left out portions of his sentences. Quite appropriately, at this age the Fathers gave the boys a book on puberty, a movie on the subject, and a question and answer session where nobody raised any questions for fear of asking something stupid. Appy certainly was becoming tall and handsome, but his mind was troubled after watching many friends acquire parents and siblings. Almost every weekend couples would walk through the gathering room, sit next to a child, and whisper sweetly to them. Several weeks later that child was mysteriously gone. Appy often thought, “What’s wrong with me?” He knew he could take the garbage out. That must be worth something. He also knew that he no longer was disrespectful to Father Jeff or the nuns at the schoolhouse. It began to become quite clear to Appy’s senses that people seemingly wanted very young children. Not grown teenage boys. Missing his chance of having adoptive parents he realized he could hope all his life for something that might never happen. Only once in the past did a couple sit down next to him. The pounding of his heart went on for weeks as he dreamed good dreams, but much to his heart’s calling nothing came of it. The St. Matthew staff was beginning to see that Appy was becoming a very good teen. When he was taking driver’s training, Father Larry told him, “Appy, you and I will drive around the school parking lot on the weekends for practice.” “That‘s super,” answered Appy. Sister Jenny appointed herself to take him for his first driver’s test, even though he had no job or car.