Straight Up

The Chic Collection The newspaper crumpled a bit while he held it in place reading a strange article. The article was in reference to a man who had been caught stealing fifty seven brassieres, without the intention of selling them. All Jonathan wondered was what the man could have done with fifty seven brassieres. Jonathan was an independent man, single, good looking, yet removed from female relations, having been used badly by one last female, about seven years ago which, he had not recuperated from yet. He moved his legs together noticing his male gender interested in the fifty seven brassieres. Sometimes, Jonathan absorbed the personality of the character he would read in a book, magazine or paper and, this was one of those times. Jonathan decided to find out more about this character named Gus. He keyed in for the required information over the internet and, Gus being local, was not difficult to find. He called the jail to find his address. Soon Jonathan was on his way to see where the man had been living. To his astonishment, it wasn’t a shabby apartment building with all the old creeks that cause people to whish each other dead. This guy, Gus, lived in a very old Victorian house, well taken care of and with a beautiful garden decorated with all the warm and chilly fall colors. Halloween hadn’t happened yet. Perhaps he wanted all the brassieres as a Halloween trick or treat party. Jonathan started to construct fantasies of Gus’s use of fifty seven bras. He parked and wandered around the yard. He wanted to know if Gus had family so, making pretense he needed directions, Jonathan knocked on the door finding a button and ringing that too. He looked both ways and tried the door knob. Since the door knob turned he went in finding a double door parlor. Past the second set of doors, a nice spacious round hall greeted him. He reasoned, the police must have left the door open. The voices surprised him. He hid behind one of the red velvet curtains giving way to the sunny sitting room. His heart was beating loudly. A real estate agent was showing the house bringing his client’s and Jonathan’s attention to the decorated trim around the upper walls. Gus had good taste. The real estate agent and his customer left by the door. Feeling safe after being locked in by the real estate agent, he shyly walked in to the rest of the house. There must be a female in this house to look the way it did. Every personal article was still intact. Jonathan came across Gus’s personal computer and turned it on. He checked some files under documents and found one letter. Pulling out a USB he copied all the document files to browse through at home. Amazed that a real estate agent would bring someone into a house while there were personal belongings, he felt for Gus as he entered what was his bedroom. Maybe Gus was gay; maybe he had a bunch of whores to dress up. When he left, he felt relieved to know that Gus wasn’t a regular thief however a thief none the less. Browsing the documents he found one file. Gus subscribed to a dating service and had kept track of all the girls he had dated and the number added up to fifty seven. A bra for each he thought immediately. In the next document there were fifty seven names of men. Gus must have dated men too. Jonathan started to feel excited by what Gus might have been up to. Jonathan’s life became excited and he bought fifty seven brassieres with a fifty percent discount coupon. He then left each bra, previously placed in an envelope, in the mail box for each of the addresses of the fifty seven men with the address of one of the women Gus must have dated. He left instructions for each of the brassieres to be delivered to one of the woman’s addresses. Jonathan was becoming Gus. How many men would deliver a nice, new bra to an unknown woman, thought Jonathan. After work, within the same week, Jonathan stopped at the house again and slid in through the unlocked window he had left behind. This time he went to the attic and was astounded at the orgy material he found there: an inflatable doll collection, a male’s underwear collection, a rubber collection, vibrator collection and some S&M collection articles. What threw him off a bit was the big battery with alligator clips. Gus was a bit of a pain taker or giver. There was even a glass bottle with a red arrow pointing at the mouth of the bottle. He even found an enema next to two bottles of champagne. He heard the door open as voices were heard down two flights, the door was shut. It wasn’t a real estate agent this time. He quickly shut the attic trap door and waited in the attic. He hid behind one of the closets where a collection of odd clothing hung. The pulse in his veins was making too much noise. His ears picked up on the beats. He heard a dog bark. Jonathan could not believe a dog had made it in, hopefully those people whose voices seemed to all be female, would leave soon. Their voices indicated they were going to come up to the attic and so they did. He heard them clambering and reaching for the attic trap. As soon as they tried to push the attic trap open, he pushed down on it with all his weight, making it impossible to open. The barking dog continued barking in a very rough way, while some of the females tried hushing him saying everything was alright. Two of the females insisted on opening the trap. Jonathan stood forcing the trap shut with all his weight. He heard one of them say it was useless and, that they should come back with some “Ron” guy to help them open the trap. All Jonathan thought was that these women had to do without Gus’s goodies for now. He started to enjoy the fact of overpowering women and, not allowing them to have Gus’ sexual toys for the moment. One of them was on the cell phone asking this “Ron” guy to come over. “Not now”, prayed Jonathan, “not now, tomorrow or this afternoon” he thought trying vainly to influence Ron’s unknown schedule. Jonathan heard a female voice announce Ron would come over immediately. He got worried, their dog was still barking. Ron must be their handy man and probably liked all these collections or part of it. He swore to himself. Within ten minutes Ron was at the attic trap with Jonathan standing over the trap. He felt Ron push up thrust the trap door. Jonathan thought of hiding again and did. The trap opened, Jonathan’s heart was beating too loud, he held his breath and then breathed shallow, salivating excessively. He watched them all come into the attic. His deodorant smelled too much, he swallowed with a gulp which seemed to be radioed out through a megaphone. The dog was left below, still barking. He heard all of them talk and look at Gus’s collections. The dog clambered in too and cornered him within barks. The women and Ron looked at him in disbelief. After a few questions, Jonathan admitted he was friends with Gus. None of the women knew him and doubted every word Jonathan made up. One of the women, romantic looking, challenged Jonathan in saying that if he was friends with Gus, then he could show them one of Gus’s favorite games. Ron agreed that Jonathan had to show that, he was friends with Gus by showing that, he did know about Gus’s sexual preferences. Jonathan turned red, especially because he had shut down on sexual relationships. Jonathan related Gus’s fifty seven brassieres ploy which was Jonathan’s excuse to build his own fantasy. He told them he had finished the job by sending a bra to each of the men on the list, with instructions to deliver the brassier to a specific female from another dating list. He showed them a folded copy of the letter he had kept with him. The girls did not believe what he had done because he had signed the instruction letter, with Gus’s name. Ron started to get jealous as to all the female attention being diverted towards this Jonathan who did not fit in to Gus’s scheme. He pulled out the cel