Lollipops, Bubblegum, Death and Lies
A young life scarred by a culture of silence
by
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The rumbling of the lorry sounded closer, and the next thing I can remember was one of the rear wheels of the lorry mounting the pavement , and the handle of the pushchair being snatched from my hands as it somehow it became wedged under the rear wheels. I remember feeling puzzled, as the lorry showed no signs of stopping, and I ran towards the rear of the lorry, vainly hoping I could release the handle of the pushchair. I watched in turmoil, as Pamela was thrown out to the left, towards the wall, and I didn't know whether to stop and tend to her, or, though God knows what I could do, to try to help Susan, then I stopped, absolutely rigid and terrified, as if paralysed in my mind as well as my body.
The older children on the opposite side of the road could hear the commotion and they were shouting a name, 'Mr Ward, Mr Ward !', urging him to stop, as I watched, helpless, not knowing at all what to do. Pamela was crying, I could feel panic waving across me, and I could see that Susan was still clutching the sides of the pushchair, her body bent forward. I could see her face, (and this memory will stay with me until the day I die), this little face, with her blonde hair slightly covering it, was full of fear. Susan was only five years old for Gods sake, what was that all about?. Then the handle of the pushchair crumpled and her little body was thrown to my right, her left, but the wheels kept on moving and Susan disappeared beneath them.
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About the Book
A harrowing, though sometimes humorous story of a young child with a naturally pleasant disposition and ‘always willing to please’ attitude, suffering the pains of growing up in a culture of silence.
From the age of seven years old she began to be the subject of long-term forced incest by her much older brother, who then went on to eventually take his own life, leaving her to endure in silence the guilt of these acts, for her parents sake.
At nine years old, after her involvement in the tragic accidental death of her niece, the silence of those involved left her to believe that she alone was responsible.
About the Author
Brenda Fewtrell Brown was born in Birmingham, England, in 1950. This was a somewhat unexpected birth as her mother had only been admitted to hospital for the removal of a tumor, being completely unaware that she was also pregnant.
Despite this rather unusual entrance into the world, and her parents total shock at her arrival, she grew to become a happy loving child, and a belated sibling to her five much older brothers and sisters.
She married Michael Brown in 1970, and they have one daughter, two sons, and four grandchildren, and they currently live in Tamworth, in Staffordshire, England.
After bringing up her own children, she went on to gain her Nursery Nursing Examination Board Diploma, with some distinction, and until her retirement she worked in the Nursery Early Years Educational department of a local Staffordshire County Council primary school.
She enjoys reading and has a penchant for writing humorous poetry, some of which has been published locally, and is greatly enjoyed,(accompanied by much giggling and tittering) by family and friends alike.
Her greatest pleasure in life is having her grandchildren around her, where she encourages each of them to be themselves, and to talk openly about everything.