The Long Way Home

Spring had evolved into summer, and though she was dating often, Ellen had yet to meet that special someone.  She had met a few nice men, but never really felt inclined to begin a relationship with any of them.    In a way, she knew the whole dating thing had been good for her as it got her out of the house, giving her the opportunity to develop a social life.  Ellen even tried her hand at Speed Dating, a unique way of meeting twelve men for six minutes at a time; however it was an adventure that she didn’t feel the need to experience a second time.  Ellen laughed as she thought it would have been more efficient to have an emergency button under the table of each woman; thus preventing her from wasting six minutes of her life that she would never get back.  Pushing this button would quickly dispose of any man with  a laminated bus pass, spray on hair or a belt buckle the size of a Frisbee.   Ellen remembered how surprised she was at the number of men wanting to be intimate rather quickly.  It was for that reason that Ellen preferred dating older men; convinced that sex would not be so much of an issue.  However, thanks to the release of Viagra, it was a whole new ballgame, and she found herself in shark infested waters.  It was getting irritating, and she was tired of always being on the defensive end.  Ellen smiled as she thought how much more effective it would have been if the discovery had come from a woman.  The female version of this male libido drug would target the blood flow to the brain and only the brain causing the release of endorphins.  This would in turn cause the men in question to think they had already had sex, thereby allowing the dating process to continue at least through dinner.