Women, Money & Cheesecake
The Sweet Truth about You and Your Money
by
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Chapter Four: The Club of Womanhood
Unique individuals, universal needs. As women, no matter what our race, socio-economic class, marital status, parenthood status, or other distinction, we experience certain universal financial events throughout our lives. The fact is, women are members of a club, the club of womanhood. As such, we have many roles. Everyone can identify with at least some of these roles and some of us may see ourselves in many of them.
We are daughters, sisters, wives, partners, mothers, aunts and grandmothers. We are friends, caretakers, income earners, nurturers, educators, boo-boo kissers, party planners, CEO's, gardeners, dog walkers, coaches, therapists, lovers, budgeters, chauffeurs, chief cooks and bottle-washers and even presidential candidates. And this description could be all the same woman!
As women, we may have to care for our elderly parents, plan for our children's educations or other goals and make sure we are financially secure in our own retirements. Some women may deal with these situations all at the same time in their lives. We all have concerns surrounding being alone later in life and who will care for us. We all worry about dying or becoming disabled and how we could still contribute to the family income. We wonder, if we are unable to speak for ourselves, whether our wishes for the future would be carried out. Some of us will marry and some won't. Some may live a full lifetime with their partners; many others won't for one reason or another.
When I was born and raised it was understood women grew up, got married and had babies. Period. College education was considered the exception, not the rule, for women in my neighborhood. I planned for a job in clerical work and only planned on working until I got married. No one really commented on my academic ability until a high school counselor told me I was smart, something that had never crossed my mind. I married at age 20 but it didn't last and at age 24 I married again. I was going to get it right! My second husband already had three children from his first marriage and I needed to continue working to help support us and his children. Nine years later, with no children of my own and no college education, my husband left me for a younger woman. Suddenly I went from being a second income in support of the household to my sole means of support --no alimony, no nothing. I was terrified, but also somewhat excited. What was going to happen? I had gone from my parents' house to a marital home to being completely on my own. -LT
What message can we take from this commonality? We must realize our planning process needs to take these issues into account, and what works for the men in our lives may not be so great for us. We also need to realize what worked for prior generations in a different kind of social structure may not work for us in a society that is more global than it used to be. We may need to realize whatever we have experienced or are going through now, whether we are in financial ruin or riding high, there are other women who have been through the hard times before, lost all their money, had bad things happen to them or made decisions they regret.
Women may need to take stock of where they are, wherever that may be, and look around. There are members of the club all around us who have been there, done that. It may be your best friend, the woman in the next cubicle at work or the woman standing behind you in the line at the grocery store. How many times have you heard the line, “I don't know how you do it.” Hasn't every woman? After all, look at all that we deal with in our daily lives!
With children literally screaming for attention, bosses making daily demands, spouses or partners in need of our time, it's no wonder that we let the less vocal items in our lives simply fall into the category of “I'll deal with that later.” When is that going to be? Have you found yourself just moving forward on remote control, paying the bills as they come in and not really having a clue as to the big picture? Does the little voice in your head remind you that you need to save; however, it just doesn't happen?
With all that we accomplish as women, we are fully able to choose to address “the finance issue.” Understanding money is one of those things we can master and feel good about as we make the choice to take it off the “deal with that later” list. After all, club membership has its rewards!
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About the Book
When we decided to write this book, one of the first questions we asked ourselves was, “Does the world need another book about money?” There are tons of them out there: books about how money works, the mistakes people make with their money, trying to understand the stock market, and on and on --a virtual deluge of facts, opinions and approaches. So, let us ask you a question. How is it going with all that information? Have you put any of it to use yet? Did you finish the book? Did you feel so depressed about checking “yes” to just about every mistake listed in some of the books that you said to yourself, “It's hopeless.” Do you now find yourself in more or less the same place you started, just somewhat more confused? Put that all away now. The guilt stops here. This is a “no-recrimination” zone. This book is not really about money; it is about you and your untapped ability to create a space for financial success in your life. No matter where you are, no matter what side of the street you live on, no matter how much or how little you have, how young or old you are, you can do something for yourself starting today using the incredible resource you already possess: your own character. Don't get us wrong. It is great to gather information about money and become more informed. However, we are all unique individuals. This book is about recognizing what works for you in this vast sea of financial data. It is “the sweet truth about you and your money.”
About the Author
We are three different women from different backgrounds.
Brona Pinnolis worked for 25 years as an attorney, including many years as Managing Partner of her own firm. Shifting focus, she turned to financial services and now teaches Business Law, Ethics, Criminal Justice and other related courses at the graduate and undergraduate level. She also works as a freelance writer and is published on the local, regional and national levels. Ms. Pinnolis has four children and serves on the boards of several charitable organizations, including Hadassah.
Linda A. Tripp has over thirty years of experience in investment advisory, financial planning, insurance and employer-sponsored retirement plans. She has worked in the banking industry and holds executive positions in Employee Benefits organizations including GMEBC (Greater Memphis Employee Benefits Council). Ms. Tripp has a knack for taking complex concepts and bringing them down to bite-sized reality. She was profiled in a full-page article appearing in the Memphis Business Journal as a “straight-talking…get-to-the-point” financial advisor. Ms. Tripp is an independent single woman.
Paulette Williamson has worked as a financial advisor for over twenty-three years with the same firm. Previously she worked in a Fortune 500 company as a middle-manager. She turned to the financial world after a corporate down-sizing and has never looked back. A seasoned advisor, Ms. Williamson is the voice of calm and reason with her clients. She is an empty-nester with a blended family and serves on the boards of several charitable organizations, including CASA (Court-Appointed Special Advocates).
Women grasp that the strength of our message is in our collective experiences.