A Note from the Author
My stormy journey is a work that had been unwritten and unspoken for many years.Others have spoken and written of their own stormy pasts, but for many who embrace my work, this will be the first encounter of what has been hiding behind my outer shell. I always knew that I had a need and a desire to put my story on paper for others to share. I truly believe that there are so many others who will be able to relate to my journey of dealing with the loss of someone dear, struggling through the pits of depression, and trying daily to live past the emotional pain of sexual abuse as a child.
For many years I hid my feelings from my loved ones, including my own mother. Due to my mother’s constant battle with drugs and alcohol during my childhood, we did not have
the communication of a typical mother and daughter. We lived apart more than we lived together. Our relationship was mended during my adult years prior to her untimely death, but she remained unaware of the unfortunate abuse I suffered because I chose to keep her in the dark.
Life has its highs as well as its lows. Sometimes there were lows that I never knew would reach. I have come to the realization that while I was at my low points there was quite a bit of learning that I needed to do. I had quite a bit of unforeseen strength and, more than anything, I had quite a bit of forgiving to do. It was during a plateau that I met a man who helped me to learn that I deserved to be at the top of every mountain everyday. It was this man who was the firrst to learn of my stormy journey and yet he allowed me to be myself. He has shown me highs that I had never dreamed of, mainly because I never knew that anything like this really existed. He always said I had a testimony, but I thought I was doing good just making it through another day without revisiting any of those pains. I was wrong and he was right. It is not enough just to make it through.
Throughout my journey I have learned, grown, rejoiced, and cried over and over again. I believe every one has a purpose and mine has just been unveiled. Without these storms I would not be the person I am today. There is a reason for everything and I believe that what didn’t break me helped to make me that much stronger. There are many that I could blame for the troubles in my life, but rather than point blame I have chosen to overcome every stumbling block that was thrown in my way.
Many of the writings in this work are true to
my personal life, but a few are true to others who have allowed me to peer through the windows of their souls for a short time.
To all those who thought I would be nothing more than a statistic, count it somewhere else. I refused to be a part of those numbers.
To all those who have been there by my side as well as behind me to help hold me up when I was down, thank you. I am making it through every day one day at a time as I continue to put my trust in the Lord (Proverbs 3:5).
To my two beautiful and precious children,
mommy loves you more than you ever will
To my most wonderful and loving husband,
thank you for showing me the unconditional
love that I never knew was possible. You are my
#2 man, because as you know God always comes first, and without Him we would not have been possible. Thank you, honey, for being the king of our castle. Thank you for being my umbrella through my stormy journey. More than anything, thank you for continuing to walk beside me during our Christian Journey. I love you more and more each day. Thank you God for everything, especially for blessing me with the wisdom to choose you and him.