Introduction
I spoke to God last night while I slept, then asked the questions I’ve always had but always felt I’d keep to myself, our conversation went like this!
Dear Jesus, as I lay here in peaceful slumber I can’t help but think there is so much more I can do to help mankind. In the last few weeks you have allowed me to partake in all aspects of your church again, for that I am very grateful. However Jesus, you know me better than anyone else, at this time I need the guidance of God, yourself along with the Holy Spirit to achieve my goal to help people. I have a passion for mental illness, I am willing to take whatever steps are necessary to learn and help people in the same situation as myself.
I believe I have the first ingredient, which is compassion. The second ingredient, which is passion, is something I wake up with every day. The third ingredient is in the knowledge of living with a mental illness for over 30 years of my life. No books can teach you these skills. The fourth ingredient is being patient, I believe if people have someone to talk to it does make them feel better with understanding, compassion and knowledge, that the person they are talking to does understand as they battle the illness themselves. I believe everyone has a story to tell, and mine is called Bipolar Shoes.
Mental illness (in my opinion) is not a quick enough service in the healthcare field. There are not enough true professionals in the field to meet the demand. However, that said, I believe there could be a vital need for people like myself who have been through the process, been frustrated yet persevered because of our strength and belief in the system, I know we could help people until professional help is available. I want to be part of the solution to help people who are scared, frightened or not sure what is going on with them mentally.
I find myself in hospital again with my illness. Once again I feel the strong need for a psychiatric professional in our area. I think its absurd to have to wait six months or more to get an appointment to see a psychiatrist also then have to travel to see them. I am committed to being a vital part of this team also to work with people and gain their trust in knowing that I am going to do everything possible to help them.
I consider myself an expert on Bi-polar disorder as I have lived and functioned with it for most of my life. I would love to share my knowledge with people who are similar and interested in making an effort to make mental health better in our community also in the world. Yes, I am but one voice, this is my life the only life, I know. Mental illness is an illness not an excuse I am living proof that you can lead a productive life while also making a difference.
I believe the time has come, with your guidance God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit I know I can prevail. You once taught me that the strong must help the weak, that people will accept the work you do in the name of God, also that all people are your children. I believe in miracles as I am still on this earth because of your grace. The miracle I want to achieve is making people in our communities and world more aware of mental illness. That it is not an evil thing, but as an acceptable illness, that can be treated and managed. I will commit the time along with the effort to make this miracle happen, put my passion into helping the less fortunate as well as educate them with my knowledge of mental illness. Hey I’m Irish I love to talk and fight. I liked to drink to but found it got me in too much trouble, I’ll share all that with you later.
My motto lately has been “People do Matter” I know that I was put on this earth for something special, maybe this is my calling. I don’t think I have ever been so passionate in regards to anything. I’m not afraid of hard work or working for a cause, I believe fate happens for a reason. I have spent time in the hospital three times over the last few months but not once have I had a visitor, nurse or doctor that really knew what the hell I was going through.
I am flat ass broke Jesus; I don’t know how much longer I can cope with life the way it is now. I don’t want to kill myself anymore, now that’s a good thing. You made me realize that was a bad plan so I figured I’d write a book called Bipolar Shoes, an autobiographical story of my life.