Till Death Do Us Part:

So, church leaders who are charged with the care of the flock need to see the abuser for who he or she is: a lion or a bear, and church leaders need to go after that lion or bear and free the sheep from its paws.  But most church leaders are more content to play it safe and say, “Well, we’ll be praying for you,” or, “Your job is to be a good mother and wife, go home and be obedient.”  And when shepherds tell their abused and broken sheep this, they leave the defenseless sheep and their lambs in the paws and jaws of those lions and bears.

Church leaders need to see the abuser for what he or she is.  How could a ram be of the flock and still attack a ewe?  Didn’t Jesus say in the Book of John chapter 13 verses 34 and 35: “A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another.  By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye also have love one to another,” (KJV).  So, could or would a spouse act out in an abusive manner towards their spouse if they were trying to show the world that they loved that person and were trying to be a disciple of Christ.  Couldn’t we then say that if a person was abusing his or her spouse, and refused to stop the behaviors, and never repented of the abuse, that they are not committed to Christ and may not really be a Christian?

I found out some other interesting things about the care that shepherds have for their sheep.  If a sheep somehow rolls over onto its back, because of their short little legs they cannot stand back up without the assistance of the shepherd.  Shepherds of David’s age did not have barns or fenced in areas to keep their sheep at night, so they made a pen out of stones.  They had a short wall that went all the way around an area, and the gate area is where a shepherd would lay down so that no predators or thieves could walk in through the doorway.  Isn’t it interesting that Jesus said in John chapter 10 verses 1-4, “I tell you the truth, the man who does not enter the sheep pen by the gate, but climbs in by some other way is a thief and a robber.  The man who enters by the gate is the shepherd of his sheep.  The watchman opens the gate for him, and the sheep listen to his voice as he calls his own sheep by name and leads them out.  When he has brought out all of his own, he goes on ahead of them, and his sheep follow him because they know his voice,” (NIV).

So, as shepherds in our churches today, we do stand at the church doors greeting the flock.  And in the same way as shepherds of old, do we notice if a sheep is limping, maybe it got injured that day out in the field?  Are we noticing that one of the lambs has burrs in its fur and we pull it aside and take them out to make the lamb more comfortable?  Are church leaders, like shepherds, laying down their lives at the gate of the pen to protect the sheep from wolves?  Are church leaders, who deal with domestic violence issues, true shepherds or hired hands who run from the attacking wolf?

And, if you are wondering how important shepherds are to God, isn’t it interesting that an angel went first to shepherds, watching over their flocks to announce the birth of Jesus (Luke 2:8), and not just any shepherds, but the lowly, late night, graveyard shift shepherds?

I heard Chuck Swindoll of the radio program “Insight For Living” say that the church is like a hospital.  That one week some people in the congregation are in the emergency room, others are in the critical care unit.  Some are in the heart wing, some are in surgery, others are in recovery and many others are just visitors.  The following week, those who were in the critical care unit of life are still there, some are out, someone moved up to the recovery area from the emergency room of life, and those who were just visitors are now in the critical care unit.  His point was so true, and any pastor, priest, elder, deacon or other church leader can tell you that they purposefully stand at the front doors of the church each week to meet and greet the people and to find out what the state of the flock is.  As a church leader, do you see yourself as a shepherd of old, standing at the gate of the sheep pen, inspecting the sheep, making sure that those who need attention and care receive it?  And when a woman walks up to you and tells you that her husband is violent, or you see a bruise or scratch, can you be a true caring shepherd if you just tell her to go home and be a good wife?  Especially after reading what you have so far about abuse and how devastating it can be?  In the next two chapters we will talk about dealing with the abuser and how to intervene on behalf of the victim.