Your Emotional Boat
A Field Guide
by
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(E) EXTRAVERSION or (I) INTROVERSION E’s are concentrated outside of themselves, in the world around them.Their identity is very much connected to the outside world—what others can see and respond to. They tend to judge themselves by the opinions and values of others. They get their energy from the people and things outside of themselves; they focus outside of themselves to gain energy and “recharge their batteries.” I’s, on the other hand, classify things in the environment by their own understanding and values. They form an opinion of who they are by judging themselves against their own views, impressions, and beliefs. They focus inward to gain energy and may find they need to be alone in order to “recharge their batteries.” How to communicate eff ectively with an Extravert: Let them talk and think out loud. Many of them like to “talk to themselves.” This is very true of my office assistant, Marietta. She carries on conversations with herself on a regular basis. We Have several different topics handy, touch on each one quickly, and then move on to something else. No long discussions about a specific topic; they will have tuned you out and moved on to checking out the environment. So brief pieces of information, please. Extraverts will maintain eye contact when they are speaking, but when they listen, they will start scanning their surroundings and getting in touch with what is going on around them. Remember that they respond quickly to questions and outward events. They are wonderful on game shows and debates that require quick responses. During times of stress or crisis, Extraverts need to talk it out. So if you are in a helping profession, these are the people who need to talk,and love group support. They respond to activities and find security in the things and people around them. Also remember that Extraverts require an outward focus in order to stay involved and connected. They can become restless and lose interest when there is not enough external stimulation and activity. In a dire crisis like a hurricane or tornado, when an extravert suffers huge losses, they need to stay outwardly focused and busy. They need to be connected to friends and other people. It is essential that they be able to talk about the experience. It is fundamental to their natures that they reaffirm their identity in light of the things they have lost. Ask them questions, then pause and give them time to respond. Listen carefully when they do respond. As an introvert myself, I have found that many times I have a response to a topic long after the subject hasbeen changed by my coworkers. Sometimes I bring up the topic again, but usually I just let it go and do not give my opinion. Talk about one topic at a time, going in depth about that topic before moving on to something else. Introverts can have a difficult time jumping from topic to topic because it takes them longer to respond. They have that extra step of having to relate the information to their values and beliefs before they speak up. Many times extraverts will think that a topic has been agreed upon, or that there are no questions, when in truth the introvert is still processing the information. During group discussions, they will tend to sit back and listen, not because they are not listening or don’t have any ideas, but because they need to reflect and internalize the information before speaking. Also, they do not like to interrupt their talkative extraverted associates, who always seem to have aquick response. Don’t interrupt an introvert when they are speaking, because they may have a difficult time picking up where they left off . Introverts can sometimes communicate better in writing, where they have time to organize their thoughts internally. Remember that Introverts tend to lessen eye contact when speaking in order Th is is opposite of the extravert. This can cause both Introverts
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About the Book
YOUR EMOTIONAL BOAT
Field Guide
The Field Guide is a companion book to Your Emotional Boat. The Field Guide utilizes the Personality Styles of the Myers-Briggs Personality Type Indicator and compares them to a “boat” style. Readers will learn to identify their “boating style” to help them navigate through life in ways that will help them create the type of life that they want to create.
Not only will the reader be able to identify their own personal “boat” style, but they will also learn how to identify the boat style of the other people in their life.
Those involved in counseling, or the service fields, will also learn how to adapt their approach to the people they serve in order to produce the greatest benefit.
About the Author
Linda Branham, MEd. has been Director of Family Preservation Services for the Lincoln Trail Region in Kentucky for the past 14 years, and with the Family Preservation Program for 20 years.
She has been a Certified Family Preservation Trainer with the Institute of Family Development for 18 years, and a Certified Hypnotherapist with A.A.E.H. (Association to Advance Ethical Hypnosis) for 29 years. She is also listed on the Jefferson County (KY) list of Mediators for the Court.
She has Masters of Education Degree in Counseling from University of Louisville, and a Bachelor’s Degree in Psychology from Indiana University.
Her publications include the following articles:
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Frager, S. R., and Linda – “A.V. Production: Directing Non-Professional Actors,” Audio-Visual Communications, Vol. 13, No. 9, Sept. 1979, New York City. (Booklet) Frager, S. R., and Linda, - “A.S.T.D. FILM FESTIVAL GUIDE,” Distribution by The American Society for Training & Development, Madison, Wisconsin, 1980. Frager, Linda – “Sex and the Ostomate’s Mate,” Ostomy Quarterly, Fall, 1980. Linda is a public speaker and workshop presenter on Family Preservation, Stress Management, Guided Imagery, Personality Styles, and Meditation. Linda is divorced, with 3 grown children, 2 dogs and 3 cats. Her hobbies are reading, learning about spirituality (Kabbalah, Native American Spirituality, and The Course of Miracles), Yoga, and meditation. |