One of mum’s `little ways´ was always a topic of conversation amongst family and friends. You see when we were kids we never had the luxury of having a washing machine and even when we did it was always an old broken one that Pat had found at the `coup´, which is a dumping ground for other people’s rubbish but sometimes became the shopping ground for our treasures. Pat was always there, at the coup,having a good `rummage´. So whenever we had a washing machine, most of the times, it came from there. However what we were slow to realise was that the washing machines were thrown in the rubbish because they didn´t work anymore or for some other reason, which normally we never found out until mum had already started the washing and the kitchen resembled a scene from the remake of Titanic, this time without Leonardo DiCaprio and Kate Winslet but instead starring Heather and Pat from Dundee in Scotland.
Mum therefore developed a `water proof´ plan that also got the kids involved with the washing of the clothes. Mum filled the bath with warm water, added some soapy suds or sometimes just washing up liquid, then Paul and myself would remove our socks and shoes, roll up our trousers and then in we got. We washed everything, T.Shirts, trousers, socks, underwear, and the worst wash of all, the jeans’ wash.
We would walk up and down the bath and instead of a hand wash it was a feet wash. It was like something from an old Italian movie. Watching the local peasant women walking around in a large vat of grapes, crushing them with their feet, the only problem was that you would not dare drink the wine that we were making. The worst part of this type of washing, because I now can look back at that time and laugh, was rinsing the clothes out and then wringing. Oh boy! No wonder all those washing machines were always broken after all that wringing that they had to do. Wow!! Mum’s crazy ideas.
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Pat was not at all happy with this answer and after a few minutes of sitting alone in the kitchen, he came to the living room, pushed the door open, so that it looked like it had come away from its hinges, came over to the sofa, where mum was sitting, me, meanwhile standing to mum’s right hand side, slightly behind her right shoulder just waiting for Pat to come in. He then dragged mum by the hair, from the living room all the way through the house to their bedroom, then slammed the door closed. All the while to my protesting and shouting,
”Leave my mum alone, you bastard or I’ll fucking kill you.”
Big words for a little 15 year old kid.
Pat then came back to the living room, pushed the living room door open again, as it had closed slightly when mum’s foot caught the edge of it as she was dragged along the floor, pointed his finger into my face and said,
”And I’ll be back for you, you little bastard.”
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Mum loved to have the windows in the house wide open and the music on the record player blaring. Mum would be going around the house singing at the pitch of her voice. Singing some Jean Shepherd song, `Lay the blanket on the Ground´ or another that mum loved to sing at this time was by the late Lena Zavaroni called, `Ma he`s making eyes at me´.
This one particular song I always remember mum playing. There was also anything by Tammy Wynette or Jim Reeves and anything with a bit of rock`n´roll behind it. Many years before, mum was a waitress in a bar, the name of the bar was the Copperbeach, it was in Kirkton. Mum was also a resident singer there and mum said that once she even sang a song there, with `Freddy and the Dreamers´. Mum always sang `The Blackboard Of My Heart´. A definite favourite with the locals.