Don't Make Promises

About the Book

I wrote this book, Don’t Make Promises, to bring an awareness, and some positivity, along with an eye-opening view of being a caregiver, and what a majority of it entails. When some people on the outside are looking at the relationship between the child and caregiver, if it is positive, it seems like an easy job. They think, “This looks like something I can do!” Oh, contraire! Looks are deceiving. If you think that, then you have not got a clue about being a caregiver. This book opens up some really strong points, and some negative ones. If you have an open mind, and can search your heart, then maybe this book is for you.

While writing this book, I had a chance to talk to middle schoolers, and teenagers, that spoke on how it made them feel when someone promised something but did not keep their promise. The majority said they did not trust too many people after that. Some even expressed felling depressed and either wanted to do harm, steal, and many other things. Be mindful of each others’ feelings when making promises. I also observed mothers and caregivers in different settings. I listened with an open ear and learned a lot just by being a silent listener and observer. Some of the mothers were instrumental to me with helpful material, i.e., “the single caregiver who becomes pregnant while in your employ.” My situation was similar, but I was married. My employers were wonderful and allowed me to bring my baby to work. They trusted me because they knew I could handle their school-aged children, maintain the household, and care for my child. Having a job as a caregiver has taught me as much as I teach the children I look after. If you do not possess these qualities, when you start the job, you will learn, quickly, patience, caring, loving, kindness, laughing, playing, joking, cuddling, hugging, smooching, etc. It give me such a warm and comfortable feeling inside to have the children nuzzle up to me. On the floor, for instance, watching T.V., when they come and lay across my lap or lay on my back.

I have cared for children of all ages, newborn to 18 years of age. I saw many of them grow up and, still to this day in 2007, I have positive contact with the families, I can go to many of the houses and have dinner, sleep-over, or just hang out. There is something very special that Mr. Rogers always said at the beginning of his show, that made a lot of sense then, as it does now!

It’s such a good feeling, to know you’re alive,
and a happy feeling, you’re growing inside,
and you wake up ready to say,
“I think I’ll wake up snappy today!”

This is the attitude needed by all caregivers. I sincerely hope this book will be helpful and informative.

About the Author

I started babysitting at the age of seven. One Saturday afternoon a neighbor came by and asked my parents if I could watch their children while they went to the grocery store for about an hour. Just in case you are wondering, this took place in 1959. A whole world’s difference then, compared to the seven year olds now. We were much more mature at seven then. I was making 2.50 an hour.  The word spread to other neighbors about how reliable and trustworthy I was with handling the children.

Many other parents used my services for the grocery shopping, going to the laundry, out to dinner, etc. By now I could charge $2.50 an hour/per child.  My limit was four children.

As I got older my family moved into a housing complex. At the age of nine my babysitting services were at its peek. I was now making $5 – 10 an hour depending on the situation. Some of the families’ homes were not so neat and clean. So, I took it upon myself to clean their homes, wash the dishes and do what was necessary to make it comfortable for the children and myself.  When they arrived home, the children had been bathed and asleep. My salary went from $10-$20 a night to $30-$60 a night.  I had my own little business going on.

After I took care of my families’ homes, I had free time to work for other people on Saturdays.  I became independent and bought my own clothes as to take the burden off my parents because there were three other children.

I thank God for giving me the experiences that I had at such a young age.