Be The Woman He Falls For NOT the Girl He Sleeps With

Visualise the scene : you’re standing at the bar having a couple of drinks with friends after a long day at the office. A guy appears at your side and orders a beer. He strikes up a light-hearted conversation with you while the barman finishes serving other customers. The friendly stranger has a great smile. You gracefully accept when he offers to add a drink of your choice to his order. He has that “Woah!” glint in his eye. Clearly he finds you attractive. This is fantastic news because this guy is pretty hot himself. You’re smiling at his jokes. Flicking back your hair. Considering whether you would enjoy getting to know him a little better. Possible meeting places drift through your consciousness - dinner in town, a pub lunch, a weekend walk along the riverside. If he turns out to be a creep, you’ll let him down gently… or, maybe avoid his calls for a couple of weeks. You have nothing to lose! However, you should be aware that Mr Potentially Wonderful’s mind has been designed to function in a far more ruthless manner. The harsh truth is, before you have had the opportunity to coolly tap his number into your phone, Prince Charming will have reached a pivotal conclusion:

EITHER,

He will be in awe of your gorgeousness and is frantically calculating a strategy to convince you of his relationship potential.

OR,

He’ll be calculating the cost of a late night taxi in order to despatch you safely home after a night of premature passion. And, if you allow your personal details to be mentally filed away under ‘minimum effort required’, it’s highly unlikely that this guy will ever offer you more than casual sex.

Callous? Yes.

An exaggeration? No - ask any male on the planet!

Okay, so it is not unheard of for women to demonstrate an equally ruthless selection process but, let’s be totally honest - once a girl has stepped out of her bikini briefs, it’s highly likely that she’s hoping to be deliciously spoon - fed with respect, warmth and adoration.

It is not that our male counterparts deliberately set out to use and discard a varying proportion of their sexual partners. In fact, the gulf between the sexual strategies of men and women has little to do with males being wilfully manipulative and insensitive or, females being naive and vulnerable. Remember, nature never throws in a design feature just for fun when crafting living creatures. Though we modern humans consider ourselves utterly detached from all other sexually reproducing species, we are each guided by pretty basic instincts when it comes to interacting with a potential mate. Despite our complex moral, religious and political views, human beings follow the same general animal pattern as most of our fellow primates:

Powerful instinctual signals will begin to influence Mr Potentially Wonderful as he keenly scrutinizes your qualities. His subconscious is fully aware that should this union produce a child, it is the female of the species who will carry the heaviest burden. In female mammals (yep - that’s us!), the demands of internal fertilization, pregnancy and early rearing responsibilities are especially high. Unless your man happens to be a seahorse or a particular breed of bird, biological factors will prevent him taking over as a primary caretaker during the early stages of an off - spring’s life. And, you better believe that his instincts are SCREAMING this message directly to his subconscious.

Essentially, little is required in terms of male parental participation. Sperm is plentiful and cheap to produce. Success is limited only by access to willing females. Therefore, Mr Potentially Wonderful is being subconsciously encouraged to fertilize as many eggs as possible. Only problem is, his female counterparts are receiving an entirely different message. “Be CAUTIOUS!” shrieks the little voice of reason within the female mind - “You’ll be left holding the baby!!”

So, you see, while you are wistfully considering crunching through Autumn leaves and learning about his childhood, your man is being commanded to lay you down in the long grass at the earliest opportunity!