The Teenage Pensioner

I awakened slowly and for a full twenty seconds all I was aware of was that I was lying on my back on something fairly hard with my head pillowed on something fairly soft. Then memory returned and I opened my eyes and sat up. It was pitch dark at first, but as my eyes became more accustomed to the gloom I could see that a little light was getting through. Such is vanity that the first thing I did was to explore the top of my head with my hand. Glory be, I felt hair, a full head of it, for the first time in nearly thirty years! Then I ran my tongue over my teeth and found to my satisfaction that I had a full set. I even counted them with my tongue just to make sure! It seemed as though the miracle had really happened.

By now I’d realised that I had been lying on a bare patch of ground and that my ‘pillow’ had been my trusty hold-all. I hauled myself to my feet and picked up the bag, then made one more test. As an old man I’d had a distinct paunch. Now my hands told me that had disappeared. By now completely reassured I examined my surroundings in more detail. I seemed to be amongst a collection of bushes and small trees, reminiscent of a recently planted wood or forest.