When Substance Abuse Attacks Your Home

As a dedicated Christian family, we assumed that by example, if nothing else, we would have a drug-addiction proof home.  We didn’t think it necessary for us to become acquainted with the drugs and temptations our children would be faced with.  After all, we were enveloped by a strong Christ-centered home.  We had a solid church family that offered enough activities for our children to keep occupied with, a private school, and more critical than all of these elements, a pair of godly examples who used the word of God to train up their children.

Drug addiction is no respect of persons.  I have discovered that the temptation to experiment with drugs is common to the educated as well as the uncultivated, to the rich as well as to the destitute, to the Sunday school boy as well as to the skeptic, to the democrat and the republican alike.  Home situations can make a difference in fighting successfully against drug intrusion, but happily married couples as well as the separated partners are in the same arena of chemical warfare.  I beg you not to have the attitude of, “It won’t happen to us.”  Dear reader, I wish above all things that I were reading this book instead of writing its pages.  If I could turn back the pages of my life, I would go

back ten years and pick up a book like this one, embrace its content, and take to heart the practical truth in order to become more alert to the drug world around my children, my wife, and me.

This book is a true story with real people, parents, brothers, sisters, grandparents, and friends much like you.  The tears that flow from the pages of this book are real and come out of extreme disappointment.  The tragedies you will read about were heart wrenching and life changing for our family, and continue to impact our individual lives.  Perhaps these emotional and spiritual scars will be transformed into bright and shining stars that will shed light for the person who is walking in the dark drug-infested world.

One of the most difficult aspects of dealing with children who are addicted to drugs is to understand the emotional or (psychological) bonding between the addict and the drugs.  I recall the many useless wrestling matches (verbal punches only) I had with my son, not realizing that all the preaching, scolding, and name calling in the world would not be able to place a wedge between my son and his companions (drugs).  One practical way to convey the concrete relationship of a “junkie” and drugs is to relate the union to a marriage between a man and a woman.  As parents and as a family, we felt betrayed by our son to other so-called friends and alliances, whose names were alcohol, pot, acid, coke, and heroin.  The influence of drugs seeks to build a strong relationship with the addict that is almost impossible to break away from, and at the same time ventures to destroy all other associations that the addicted individual may have.  It is my opinion, based upon experience, that the drug addict who is reared in a good, solid home where strong morals and self-respect are instilled, will not only betray the people that love and care for him, but will also violate his own conscience.  He will be disloyal to all that he knows to be true, just, pure, good, and lovely.

Since you will be reading about the journey of our family, it would be helpful to get to know each one of us.  There is Fred, who is a pastor at the Temple Baptist Church, who is also working on his doctorate in psychology and Christian counseling, his wife Mari, who is a native of the Dominican Republic and an educator.  We have been married for 30 years.  Nathan is our first-born son.  Daniel is next, who is a preacher, youth pastor, and also an educator.  Daniel is married to Melissa and they are going on their second year of marriage.  Lavel is our first daughter. She leads the praise team in our youth group and attends the local university.  Lara is married to Isaac. She has a missionary’s heart and is involved in evangelism and youth ministry.  Leah is our last child.  She has dedicated her life to serve the Lord wherever He leads.  We were, as others used to say, “The picture perfect family.”