Lastag

Your mother and sometimes your father have held you and sung to you, but you never hear the end of the song. Next thing you know, it’s much later, as you are waking up in your crib. If nobody notices that you are now waking, it’s time to cry. That has always worked. It’s up to the big people to figure out if you need to be fed, changed, cuddled or want freedom to explore.

There’s so much to know in your first year. You have learned so much already. You learned more in the first 24 hours of your life than you will learn in any one day period, the rest of your life.

The first thing you learned was to breathe. The next thing that happened, after the doctor put his finger in and cleared out your mouth, is that you cried. You had learned how to express distress. WOW! What next? Somebody with a white mask over her face wiped your whole body clean and you were placed in the arms of your mother. You were wrapped in a blanket especially your size. That feeling of love and contentment bonded the two of you forever. You made a few sucking noises and flexed and clinched your fingers a few times. The last hour or so had been quite stressful and you were tired. For the first time you fell asleep in your mother’s arms. For all your future life, when troubled, you had learned who could comfort you the best. Someday there would be somebody else who would care and ease you. But, that is a third of a lifetime ahead of you.

The first time you awaken there is a little knot in your tummy. You are now learning about hunger. There comes that sucking feeling in the mouth. That godlike mother knows your needs. She nestles your face into her breast. You do what comes naturally. The knot disappears in your tummy. Back to sleep after your first burp, as a little milk runs out of your mouth.

That is the mouth that has just involuntarily given its first silly smile.

Now this first year has brought you more sensations and experiences than anyone realizes. Most of the things that happened to you do stick. You can remember everything. You know which things can hurt you. You know those experiences that bring pleasure. You learned about tone of voice. In fact, one of the most frustrating items, is the fact that you can’t talk, yourself. That starts to come by the end of the first year. It’s a little easier for girls as they do develop faster. There’ll be more manual dexterity, vocabulary and physical development for growing girls.

However, both boys and girls are beginning to stagger around, arms wide by the end of the first-year. Human babies are unable to care for themselves. Some lower forms can walk right away. Human grown-ups are grateful for the necessity of nurturing.

So, with this past year of development these grown-ups are delighted to be celebrating your year of growth and learning. This first birthday party re-enforces to you, that you are special. Actually, you are probably average. 96 percent of all people are average. However, with above-average attention from parents the odds increase that you’ll be in the 4 percent group that rises above the herd.

Now that you are convinced that the world revolves around you, what words of wisdom can a loving grandfather offer to improve your life?

You are one-year old, also walking and saying a few words, but you still are not potty trained. This is because it takes a certain length of time for little humans to learn some things. This is something you will learn within the next year or shortly afterwards.

The most important word of wisdom to a one-year old is COOPERATE. Share your toys, time, conversation and playthings with others. Now you are only one-year old. You cannot understand this concept. It will be up to your parents to let you know when and how to share. They will have reinforced this knowledge for you by showing disapproval, when you could be more cooperative with your fellow human beings. When you show a spirit of cooperation, a good parent will let you know how pleased they are with your growing awareness and spirit of giving.

This is a gradual process. It must be started when you are very young. Children cannot be turned off and on like a faucet. Development of sharing starts with mobility, walking in particular. This sense of sharing will grow with speech patterns and understanding as they develop.

To allow a one-year old free reign and to call the shots, is to open the gates to anarchy.

There really has never been a good educational course on parenting. It’s a hands on job training program. So, as a raw product, one-year old, you’ll find frustration. Frustration will come as life goes along and parents nudge you into a way of life that makes you an important part of the human family. The nudge generally is not in the direction your determined personality would like to go.

Wait, there is more frustration. Parents are not perfect (neither are teachers, preachers or cops). However, most try to do their best and a very human trait for parents is to stub their toe occasionally. So, frustration will come to you also as a one-year old. This will prepare you for mistakes from parenting that you’ll be exposed to all your life.

These nudges to a given path will have to be expected by you. You already do understand at one year, that your parents love you and at this age you are completely dependent upon them. So, Grandpa wishes you well. Grow and pick up more smarts this coming year. I pray your parents are as consistent as they are loving. Their consistency will make or break your future. For you, Grandpa hopes for consistent guiding, loving and smart parents.

You pleasure me.