Why Men Marry and Why Men Don't
by
Book Cover & Preview Text
CHAPTER ONE
WHY MEN MARRY
1. Love:
Nothing makes a man more vulnerable than that fantastic euphoric feeling of being bewitchingly weak-in-the knees and crazy in love. He's incurably hooked, floating on clouds, clicking his heels, humming a love song and dancing down the aisle vowing to love happily ever after
2. Lust:
When a man is deeply in lust, his testosterone is raging and his loins are levitating. Hormones run amuck and this helpless man is enslaved by an uncontrollable primal passion to possess this wanton woman. He pounds his chest, bays at the moon and craves to capture her, drag her to his cave and sate his sexual appetite through all eternity.
3. Trophy Wife:
This show-off, self-proclaimed trophy winner gets to wear his extraordinary prize (often purchased at an exorbitant prenuptial price) of a beautiful and usually much younger second or third wife on his arm. He basks in the covetous cordiality of his cronies
4. Companionship:
It's a lot more fun to laugh out loud at I Love Lucy reruns with shared Chinese take-out. Besides, with two you get egg roll.
5. Pressures:
Business: A fetching wife is a professional asset and definitely a leg-up on the corporate ladder
Financial: When a man marries for money, he is often considered to have a good head for business.
Family: Finally, he can make dear old mom and dad happy. And then when he gives them darling, drooling grandchildren, they will be ecstatic.
Friends: He's a widower who was married most of his long life. His and her women friends are on a mission to find an appropriate wife for him before an inappropriate one finds him. They want him safely married sooner rather than later, to save him from himself
Social: He's one of the few single men left in his social circle and just doesn't fit in with the scheme of things. The wives arrange blind dates for him or flirt with him. The men keep an eye on their wives and secretly have freedom envy.
Religious: At long last, he's given up his sinning ways, seen the light, settled down and done the right thing, by God.
6. Advancements And Enhancements:
Business: Perhaps she's amiable, even anxious to back a new husband financially or with her participation, in his venture. If the scenario is her family's business, then he's in a prime position for promotion before he's even hired.
Social: If he is strictly lower case society and lacking in prominence but she is socially well situated, she can swing previously slammed doors wide open by simply saying, "I do."
7. For Spite:
This rakish rogue is playing rebound relay. He has a mean streak and wants to get married just to make a former wife or girlfriend jealous.
8. Caretaker:
He is helpless and wants to be pampered, pleased, placated and petted. And the poor love needs someone to sort his socks, ski equipment and sedatives.
9. Crisis:
Illness: A macho man can quickly be reduced to a frightened little boy by an imagined or real malady and the fear of being helpless or alone has prompted many a man to revive his priorities and promptly propose.
Fear Of Death: A life threatening disease or a tragic accident can cause a confirmed bachelor to reexamine his life choices and even exchange hurried marriage vows at his hallowed bedside.
Relocation: Whether a corporate transfer, a lifestyle change, or even a military move, men will often give marriage more consideration for fear of being by themselves.
10. Conventionality:
Like Noah's Arc, his world consists of two-by-twos, so he conforms and gets married just for sake of convention. He may not invest energy or emotion, but being single makes him odd man out. Also he may feel that it's the appropriate time to start a family.
11. Likes Being Married:
Career Husband. He enjoys playing house, likes being a husband and likes having a wife. It's a feel-good habit with him, so if this marriage fizzles and fails, he won't be discouraged, he'll just get married again.
12. Wants A Housekeeper/Hostess/Social Director:
Experience has taught him that good help is expensive, hard to find and difficult to keep. So he does one stop shopping and marries the perfect candidate for the position...after interviewing many contenders, of course.
13. Arranged Marriage:
While culturally correct in some countries and an accepted custom by a few religions, these are not affairs of the heart, and love and romance are often the missing ingredients in these negotiated nuptials.
14. Second Chance
Loves lost but never forgotten.
Reunited high school or college sweethearts who have lost touch and time but the memories lingered and the embers simmered.
Revived strong sexual attraction that was unconsummated because one or both of the parties was unavailable. Now free to let the sparks fly.
Rekindled the flame with former wife or girlfriend. Was carrying a torch and realized the break-up was a bad mistake. There is an urgency to marry in all of these scenarios for fear of loosing the relationship again.
15. Wants A Mother For His Existing Children:
He fought for full custody and truly loves the little tykes but he desperately needs a full time live-in mom ...and a life.
16. Merger:
Financial: Money marries money and the sum total makes
more money, or at least lives a lovely lifestyle while trying.
As somebody's mother once said, "It's as easy to fall in love
with a rich girl as a poor one."
Family: The union of families has long been used for power,
prestige and possession. So he may propose marriage to seal
the agreements and strengthen the arrangement.
Business: Nothing fuses two companies faster, and with
more fanfare, than the marriage of two principals or their
offspring. Many a male has wedded for a windfall.
Formats
Book Details
About the Book
Most women at different stages in their lives—and for different reasons—want to be married, are married, have been married, or are between marriages. Why Men Marry and Why Men Don't is a tell-all self-testing book that titillates, entertains and educates the shrewd single woman, and the curious and courageous man.
It's a non-scientific parlor game to help you determine why certain men marry and others don't, define the type of man you want to marry and discern the ones you don't. Also disconnect the traits causing you to attract the wrong kind and divine definitive questions to ask men along the way. Then consider what could happen if you never find the man that you want to marry but choose to stay superiorly single.
This fresh, funny, feel-good must read, contains a calculating choose-a-husband system instead of a catch-and-corner any man scheme. It gives the husband hunting woman a path to new found clarity and a personalized shopping list to make her the "chooser" instead of the passive "chosen."
Why Men Marry and Why Men Don't should be required reading for the clever contemporary woman in choosing the consummate husband.
About the Author
Jean Sanders Torrey, "love expert," author, gives classes at the elite Learning Annex just like Donald Trump and Dr. Phil, has been featured on "Ask the Expert" segment of FOX TV AM Morning News and has done over 100 Radio and Television interviews. She is a former fashion model, fashion editor for Movieline Magazine and a social columnist for Beverly Hills Today. She has also been a personal shopper at Beverly Hills Saks Fifth Avenue for celebrity clientele.
Born and raised in Kentucky, she lost her Southern accent at Northwestern University without loosing her inherent Southern graces. A professional horsewoman, she has taught such celebrities as Brooke Shields, Farrah Fawcet and Joanne Woodward to ride and jump. Woodward and her husband Paul Newman asked Torrey to assist in the set up of the hunter/jumper stable on their 57-acre Far West Farms New York.
A head-turning, traffic-stopping between husbands woman, Jean Sanders Torrey sophisticated sense of humor is well exemplified by Why Men Marry and Why Men Don't, her first book.