THE INSIDE-OUT POCKET
Marty sat in the window seat in the hallway, looking very serious for all his eight years. He had always been a very happy-go-lucky young man, but for the past several months he had been very quiet and very, very thoughtful.
Of course, he had every right to be quiet and thoughtful since he had been without his mother for two long years. But he had accepted her death quite surprisingly well. He had the most wonderful Dad in the world, so he thought . . . and it was true. Paul Harrington had a most remarkable way with his son and they were very close. He shared every moment that he could with Marty and did things with him that were fun and worthwhile, too. And so, with the death of his wife, he had the added responsibility of being both a mother and a father to Marty and the job of explaining just why God would take his mother away from him.
To explain such a "why" was more than a monumental task for a man who was only "just human", but he had done it in such a way that his son was not bitter nor resentful.
The two of them were very fortunate to have Mrs. James for a housekeeper. She was jolly and pleasant and made a place in her heart for Marty who helped her bake cookies and frost a cake now and then (if he left any in the bowl after quite a few snitches in the beating and mixing). So life was really quite pleasant . . . as pleasant as it could be without a "mommie" to make things complete.
But here sat Marty on a sunny April morning looking far out into space, as though he had "big things on his mind".
His Dad was getting more than a little concerned and so was Mrs. James. At first they thought that perhaps he wasn’t feeling well, but a trip to the doctor proved all was well and Marty was a very healthy eight year old. They tried to ask him what was wrong, but only got a quiet, "nothing" from him, which didn’t help explain anything.
Mrs. James and Marty’s dad had a long discussion about his new attitude--not wanting to play with his friends or go to the movies with his Uncle Dick or even to have an ice cream sundae treat as usual on Sunday afternoon. But the real puzzlement was the way he was acting toward June.
June was June Frazier and Paul Harrington thought a great deal of her and even hoped that soon, perhaps, she would step into their home and fill the empty place that badly needed filling, for both he and his son.
Really, this was the second time that Paul and June had been going together. A year ago, when they had dated, and it seemed that there would be a wedding soon. Marty was as happy as he could be about it and just couldn’t be with June enough. He went with her on shopping sprees and "special treat" sprees and walk-in-the-park sprees and went almost every place with his dad and June, when they were together. And many nights June would spend with them at home, popping popcorn and playing rummy and having lots of laughs and good times.
When Marty would meet his friends when he was with her, he would always say to his friends that she was his "almost-to-be-mother" and June and Paul . . . and Mrs. James were so happy for Marty and so happy that he felt this way about June coming into their family.
Then . . . for awhile Marty had to miss June. His dad and June couldn’t agree on some important things about their marriage and so they decided that maybe it would be best if they didn’t get married after all.
Marty had been quiet then, for awhile, but seemed to accept that, too, when his dad explained it to him so that he would understand. He didn’t understand, exactly, but he tried. And Marty liked Rhonda and Sue that came to be with his dad and go places with them, but there didn’t seem to be any wedding plans coming about. And Marty did want a mother. He wanted a mother so badly. He wanted to be like the other boys and girls who always talked about their mothers and what their mothers did and all about the fun they had with their mothers and dads.
When his dad stopped seeing Rhonda, then Marty hoped that soon his dad would find someone else who wanted to be his mommie. And then his dad stopped seeing Sue, and he still didn’t have a mommie.
But here was the most unable-to-be-explained thing of all about Marty. His dad found that he still loved June and they worked out what they hadn’t been able to work out before and it looked very much like she would be Marty’s mother after all.
But here was Marty sulking and gloomy and sad and quiet and not acting like Marty at all. He wouldn’t even go with June to any of the fun places they had gone before and he was rather distant with her and even acted as though he didn’t like her at all, any more. No matter how hard June tried, she just couldn’t get close to Marty at all.
Needless to say, this had everyone in the household upset. They tried everything. They took him roller skating, to the movies, to the zoo, to basketball games, but for these past several months nothing helped. Marty still acted as though he didn’t want June anywhere around and was very happy when she wasn’t with them. This had everyone so up-in-the-air that they couldn’t even begin to think about making plans for a wedding. And June had just about decided that perhaps there better not be one, if Marty felt so strongly the way he seemed. Paul was beside himself with worry. He loved Marty and wanted him to be happy. And he loved June dearly and knew that he would be miserable without her. But he also knew that he couldn’t marry her if his son, that he loved so dearly, wouldn’t be happy with her there as his mommie.
And so Mrs. James stood watching Marty on this April morning and wishing that she could get him to talk to her and tell her what was wrong. He didn’t even want to bake cookies or frost cakes any more and even she couldn’t get close to him any more. And here she thought that he would be so happy when his daddy started seeing June again. Mrs. James just couldn’t, absolutely couldn’t, understand how he could be so different with June. He had just adored her before and just wanted to be with her every minute and couldn’t wait until he could have her there again to tell her what he had done at school or show her a good paper that he had brought home. But now when June would put her arm around him, he would twist away and run up to his room and often stay there until June and his dad had left. This just didn’t make sense. There just had to be some reason. But there just wasn’t, at least Marty would give none.
Then, all of a sudden Marty ran up the stairs and Mrs. James heard the bedroom door shut tight. She finally decided that he must be playing with his toys, but there wasn’t a sound when she went by his door later while she was cleaning upstairs.
Suddenly Marty came running out to ask how to spell "hope" . . . and a little while later he wanted to know how to spell "marry" and later still how to spell "mommie".
Mrs. James wanted so very much to ask what he needed to know these words for, but knew that he probably wouldn’t tell her if she did ask him.
Pretty soon Marty came out and asked for an envelope and a stamp. Mrs. James found an envelope for him, but couldn’t find a stamp for him. She told him that she would get one for him when she went to the store in the morning. So Marty carefully put his letter in the envelope and stuffed it in his pocket for