The Coffee House
by
Book Cover & Preview Text
Joe finished and then commented 'as you can see I'm not G.I. Joe.' Many people responded with a laugh. 'I'm also not hung up on war reflections.' 'I like to get my mind off my personal problems by attempting to solve other pointless quandaries.' 'For example I view the spring and fall time changes of the clocks each year as a unnecessary nuisance.' 'I've written a poem that I think describes a fair solution to this annoying semi-yearly tradition.'
COMPROMISING TIME
Once again it was that time of year when 'standard' and 'daylight saving' time did battle Lines were drawn for who went by what and the people would follow like cattle In actuality the only real winner was the mental state of confusion For it's already hard enough to grasp time since in reality it's only an illusion Year after year, every other season The hour sprung back and forth seemingly without much reason Continuous years of up and down till one day a 'mediator' appeared 'Hello my name is 'logic' don't panic I'm not to be feared 'Why don't we compromise this spring time and set the clocks only a half hour ahead?' 'Then we'd never have to touch time again eliminating this bi-yearly dread' 'Daylight and Standard time working together forever in peace' 'One time filled with the best of both as the clock turning insanity would at last cease' So on that historic spring day the clock took only a half hour advance Forever liberating people from clockturning drudgery by taking this compromising stance
Upon completion Joe commented that it was just a thought and to please not judge him as crazy. Joe then said 'I do have one more poem which was inspired by one of my favorite comedians Jeff Foxworthy.' 'I call it , You Might Just be an Alien.'
YOU MIGHT JUST BE AN ALIEN
Everyone knows Jeff Foxworthy with his 'you just might be a redneck 'claim to fame So follow those same lines of thought and speech as I present another personality profile game 'You might just be an alien' if you find yourself giving a rectal exam 'You might just be an alien' if your on a UFO sucking up the water from the Hoover Dam 'You might just be an alien' if you find yourself strangely attracted to cattle mutilations 'You might just be an alien' if your above a wheat field containing Doug and Dave zapping a geometric illustration 'You might just be an alien' if your up at night putting implants in the neighbors upon your street 'You might just be an alien' if your next to your big toe is the biggest one on your feet 'You might just be an alien' if you mindlessly construct pyramids in your mash potatoes 'You might just be an alien' if you feel humanitarian agencies are your bitter foes If you love strawberry ice cream and country music according to the National Enquirer 'You might just be an alien' for these are the two earth things they most admire 'You might just be an alien' if you've recently discovered your a hermaphrodite 'You might just be an alien' if you consider the Nazca plain an airport sight So tally your traits carefully and be brutally realistic in the end Because in fact 'you might just be an alien' my little potential intergallactic friend
Joe then departed the stage striding by the many people in the room who were now doubled over in laughter. Christina and Paul got up to go outside and grab a fast smoke before more poets resumed the now paused parade. Hopefully they wouldn't be too long but irregardless their mindless habit beckoned them both. So out into the quiet night they briefly exited.
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Book Details
About the Book
If you've ever wondered what an underground poetry café was like come along now on a journey through the dimly lit entrance door of the cabaret. Cross the threshold into a realm where poets rule and passions are put to verse. Examine the wide variety of ideas put forth on this anything but typical 'Open Mike Night.' Experience inspired original poems on such controversial topics as alien interbreeding right down to a final feast of Omega flakes. All the verse is intricately woven into the pages lying in between a story highlighting five of the café's regular patrons. Hear them tell their amusing tales as you witness this night unfold. Watch these five laughable borderline absurd amateur poets attempt to find meanings and truth as they inter-act on 'Open Mike Night' inside the Café Couplet coffee house.
About the Author
Hello my name is Loraine Stingle. The inspiration for my book The Coffee House came to me one night while I was in this Hypnotic Alpha state of mind. Just when I was about to doze off the idea struck me. I quickly jotted down the idea, then I drifted off to sleep. Upon awakening the next day I thought about how I've written poetry for many years now. Some of which has been published in various anthologies. It now seemed only logical to share these thoughts and stories that I'd gathered through the years with others. I rationalized that a book about an "Open Mike Night" where poets gather to voice their unique insights on many diverse subjects could be very interesting. I threw in a plot line about five of the cafes regular customers to add a consistency of thought to this story. Let the readers get to know them a little and voila!, you've got an intensified and revealing communications fest. The poems which are generously sprinkled throughout this book many times are humorous, unconventional and even absurd, but I do believe they will inspire readers to think. Above all though, I sincerely hope all the readers of my first book will enjoy it and have a fun time reading it. Hopefully they'll have as much fun reading it as I had writing it.