I Won't Die Hungry

Just as soon as the others had left, Stefka, Andrei’s sister, burst into the house. “Run away! Germans are in the village center!” she said, her voice filled with terror. We grabbed Father under his arms and hurried out of the house into the forest. All day long we heard the heavy shooting. We wandered around in the swamps and really had no idea where we were. It was the same thing all over again as in the Pushcha, except Father was very weak and there was the additional danger of drowning in the mud. When it was getting dark, I heard somebody calling my name. “Asya! Asya!” It was a man’s voice, and it echoed through the woods. I can still hear it in my mind. “Asya! Asya!” “Don’t answer,” Mother said. She was afraid it was one of the Germans. So at first I didn’t answer. But the shouting didn’t stop, and seemed to come closer. “Asya! Asya!” Finally, I took heart and answered. It was Andrei! Andrei was looking for me! If I hadn’t answered, we would probably have died there in the woods and swamp. Instead, Andrei led us to our hut, where the rest of our family was anxiously waiting for us. Once again we were all together. Later we found out that all of Nevery, which was considered a partisan village, was burned down to the ground. However, by the time the Germans attacked, not a single partisan was around. They had left before the Germans attacked. This was the strength of the partisans: they fooled the Germans time and time again. Unfortunately, the local population as well as people like us suffered the consequences. Andrei, Stefka, and their older sister – I’m sorry I forgot her name – lost their home and went to another village to live with family. We lost contact with them, but I am still filled with tremendous gratitude when I think of these generous and kind people who risked their lives to help us. Without them, I would not be writing these words. We moved into the hut. Edith, Uncle Moshe, and Aunt Celia had recovered, and Father was feeling better. But now Aunt Hannah – who had cared for Uncle Moshe – and I got sick with typhoid fever. Mother took care of us. We had no medicine, not even a blanket. I was lying on the bare ground, unconscious and delirious, because of my high fever. I couldn’t eat. I only drank some water that Mother boiled on the campfire. Somehow I survived, as did the rest of the family, without medication. We were lying on the ground and Mother Earth was our bed. I remember hallucinating and singing. Aunt Hannah and I were the last of our family to have typhoid fever. It’s interesting that Mother never got it. She wasn’t a strong woman. Before the war she was often sick. She had problems with her gallbladder and used to go to spas to drink waters that were supposed to help her. During the war, however, she had no health problems. Maybe it was due to the simple food. And I think she got some kind of vaccination when she worked for the health department in Svencionys. Perhaps that’s why she didn’t contract typhoid fever even though she took care of us and lived through the same conditions as we did. Just as I began to feel better, the Germans attacked again. The thundering artillery fire seemed to come from everywhere, especially from above. Once again, everybody ran wherever they could in an incredible panic. Mother, Edith, and I ran away together. I remember grabbing a loaf of bread as we fled from the hut. We ran deep into the thick woods. It was very wild there, the trees grew close together, and we hid in the groves between the trees. Huddled together with my family, I started eating the bread I had brought from the hut and offered some to them. “How can you eat when they’re shooting at us like this?” Mother asked. “If I am shot, at least I won’t be hungry when I die,” I answered and meant it. This went on for a few gruesome days. Finally, one night, the deafening noise stopped and quiet descended over us again. Somehow, we went back and found our hut. Everybody eventually returned – it was a miracle no one got killed by the relentless shooting or drowned in the swamps – and our everyday existence continued again.