OMG, The Things I Learned In College

Scott is about six foot two, light brown hair with bright, mischievous eyes. When he’s around, you just never know what will happen. I’m looking forward to spending another year hanging around with him. Starting his sophomore year, Scott has already gotten to know his way around a little bit. Most of us know someone like Scott. His hilarious commentary, loud laughter, pleasant smile and easygoing manner are hard to ignore. People are drawn to him, even faculty and college administrators. His behavior and quick wit will either drive you crazy or make you laugh, usually both. Scott has always been funny. Here is an event that his grammar school teachers still remember. As a little boy, Scott was doing his math homework one night when he said out loud, "Two plus five, that son of a bitch is seven. Three plus six, that son of a bitch is nine." His mother overheard what he was saying and angrily yelled, "What are you doing? Stop swearing!" Scott replied, "I'm just doing my math homework, Mom." "And this is how your teacher taught you to do it?" his mother asked. "Yes," Scott answered. Infuriated, his mother went to school the very next day and asked to speak with his teacher. Obviously upset, she asked, "What are you teaching my son in math?" Unsure of the tone, his teacher replied, "Right now, we’re learning addition." Scott’s mother continued, "And are you teaching Scott to say two plus six, that son of a bitch is eight?" After Scott’s teacher had stopped laughing, she answered, "What I taught him was, two plus six, THE SUM OF WHICH, is eight." As a humorous midtrovert (sometimes outgoing, sometimes shy), Scott can fit in with most student groups and personalities. I’ve seen him hurting inside and hugely disappointed, but never angry or mean. Like many of us, he often uses his wit and humor to disguise his true feelings. Only with Shirley is he willing to let his guard down completely. We all need someone we can trust, someone who loves us and someone who will always be there when we need them. Cars have always been a high priority for Scott. He looks for and knows the improvements and changes that are taking place each year in nearly every major brand. Of course, he is the one with the loud mufflers who is frequently stopped by the cops. They know him quite well. However, even they tend to like him. Now, with his money going for tuition, he drives an old car that he would not have given a second look to in earlier years. At one time in the past, Scott had been leaning toward motorcycles. Because he sometimes liked to get away by himself, he decided to take a ten-day ride through Central America before college. Scott recalled, “On the third day, I was riding along a two-lane road in the early morning before the traffic got too bad. Cruising at about 50 mph, just enjoying the fresh morning air, the sunshine and the beautiful views, I came up over a steep hill and found a tractor trailer coming right at me. My only choice was to bail out into the ditch. The truck kept going and the cars behind it continued right by me. I passed out. No telling how long I was there. In the hospital, I learned that a local farmer put me in the back of his truck and brought me into town. From there, the local doctor got me to the hospital. Yes, I had many (more than a dozen) broken bones, a sprained arm and torn tendons in my hand. The surgeon told me that he would have some of the locals try to find out what happened to my bike, but I never heard anything more. By the time I was able to look for the remains of my bike, it was gone. Only one handle grip and a broken mirror could be found,” he said. It took more than six months before Scott could fully close his hand. Before that, Scott had been a good athlete and was always involved with sports. He follows the professional teams, many college teams and of course our college teams. I’ve seen him bowl and he’s quite good, a great tennis player as well. Those things come easily to him. Because of his enthusiasm, sense of humor, experiences and interest in the things that are going on around him, he should do well on the radio. His girlfriend Shirley is a challenge for him. That’s why things are working out between them. Just like the radio gig, he has to realize that he wants something before he is willing to do the work that is needed to achieve the goal. She makes him work at the relationship and he loves her for it. She is a young woman who knows where she is going. Shirley can be funny too. After trying to have a discussion with him about her feelings, she concluded that Scott has only two feelings, hungry and horny. If he isn’t feeling hungry, he is feeling her. She jokingly told me that she has to carry a sandwich with her to keep him distracted. However, I have no doubt that Shirley loves that kind of attention.