OUT OF GAS? NEVER WITH JESUS examines the simplicity anyone can discover in having a very personal relationship with God. The book closely explores this relationship from a Christian perspective correlating the Israelite journey from Egypt to Canaan through the wilderness. The journey was only to take 11 days; yet, it took 40 years. Specific examples I state show very close similarities with Christian behavior today. These include constant bickering and complaining, jealousy, gossiping, slandering, and judging. These behaviors cost the Israelites 40 years in the wilderness when God desired the opposite – to draw them into His rest and love where His intimate love overwhelms each one.

Today, too often Christians make a relationship with God a religion with lists of rules and regulations. God calls each person to rest in His unconditional love and acceptance. God loves each person just as he is. He only desires to restore that intimate love relationship that was lost when Adam and Eve first sinned.

Therefore, the majority of Christians only burn out, run out of gas in their Christian walk with God. They become miserable, angry, and judgmental – especially to non-Christians. They clearly become hypocrites. (I know this from personal experience, living that way for 17 years.)

One will clearly see the excellent comparisons to the Israelite journey through the wilderness to the behavior of many Christians today. However, I do include the solution. A true, deep, pure, and intimate love relationship with God is not only possible, but is God’s deepest desire.

I am a 44-year-old, single parent of 12 and 14 year-old girls. Currently, I have been employed for 21 years as a Human Resources manager for a telecommunications company in New York City. I have obtained a BA in Economics and an MBA in Finance. Also, growing up in the Bronx, N.Y., has taught and exposed me to the basic living needs and serious challenges of drugs, alcohol, crime, etc. that people must face daily.

Unfortunately, I was not mentally and emotionally prepared to face these challenges as I matured. Often I would avoid, or even run away, from my conflicts and responsibilities. It was not until I was 37 years old that I realized I had very severe depression. How vividly I recall crying myself to sleep many evenings or seeing my hands shake so often whenever stress was occurring.

Even though I began having a personal relationship with God at age 22, I still masked my depression. It was not until 1993 that God made me face it. It is very painful watching all the props I hid behind removed. Anyone with any type of depression can easily relate. One must meet depression face-to-face because it deals with issues of the heart. These issues are very, very painful, like thorns securely surrounding one’s heart. Each thorn hurts as it is plucked out – the deeper the thorn the deeper the pain. Anyone who has experienced depression knows this is how it must be dealt with.

Fortunately for me, God removed these thorns and gently (over a few years) restored me to His love. He has totally wiped away my depression by training my mind to see life through His eyes of love. Now I only have minor depression symptoms, which I am growing out of day by day as I continue to see life through God’s eyes.

Today, life is totally exciting to live and experience. I could never be more joyful than I am right now. I cannot wait to experience everyday, just to absorb the beauty of it. Everyday is now a new dawn for me to live. I do anticipate many trials, obstacles, and challenges; but I aim to live above them and not below. I truly look forward to accomplishing many successes in my future and to truly enjoy life to its fullest. LIFE IS TRULY WORTH LIVING.

Moses responded so wisely; he went directly to the Lord and interceded for the rebels. What a magnificent example of an intercessor! Moses used godly wisdom not to debate with the children of Israel. We do well to study his example and patience in dealing with revelers and rebels. In verse 7, Moses emphasized that the Lord will choose who is the holy one. This is how it always must be; one can only be holy according to God, not according to man. If someone is anointed in some area (ex. Moses as a spiritual leader), that person must be respected and obeyed as a representative of the Lord. He requires heart-motivated obedience. When a believer strays from this, he walks in the wilderness and will only see truth from his own eyes. He will certainly rebel against spiritual authority; he becomes totally ignorant of his sin. This primetime rebellion becomes a scandal and the brunt of jokes from the unsaved world. No wonder many unsaved people refuse to become Christians; the hypocrisy of the Christian church is displayed right before their eyes in the national spotlight. Satan will never permit it to pass by without exposing it further. The problem with the unsaved world is not the unsaved world itself; it is wilderness Christians living as total hypocrites pretending to be holy in their own eyes. There is no resurrected life in their testimony; no true love of Christ flowing out. The only life the unsaved world sees is one of condemnation and judgment. The unsaved world receives the message that Christians are more known for what they are against than for what they are for. Yes, this last sentence provides a very accurate description of the wilderness church.

(Personal Note: All the unsaved basically see on the news is wilderness Christians condemning homosexuality and picketing abortion clinics. The irony is the unsaved world knows homosexuality and abortion are sins; and the unsaved world strongly desires to change. However, no love-of-God motivation inspires them to. It is incredible how frequently unbelievers have told me they truly love Jesus the person. They are convinced beyond any doubt that He is the Son of God. They strongly believe and understand the significance of His death and resurrection in God’s plan of salvation. Yet, they refuse to come to Jesus for life. Do you know why? They fear becoming like the wilderness Christians. They love Jesus but do not understand Christianity. They see no love and rest in wilderness Christians. They do not know of Canaan because most Christians live in the wilderness (coveting the sins of Egypt and seeing themselves as holy in their own eyes). So the only obvious choice for unbelievers is to remain in Egypt. I cannot blame them. Wilderness Christians are the biggest hypocrites in the world. They have become Pharisees. Where do you fit in?)

How quickly one forgets the Lord’s personal salvation! Egypt never left their hearts. Is this what the unsaved world sees in your testimony? Do they see the poison from your mouth? How often do you slander or gossip about others? How often do you walk with your self-righteous attitude on your shoulders and a big, puffed-up halo on your head? How holy do you believe you are – in your eyes or in God’s eyes? How often do you continue to live in Egypt; living in your fears and insecurity, and putting a legalistic Bible cover on your life? Do not look to me for your answers. The Word of God is well enough to stand your test. Is it not about time you went directly to God, alone and often? Is it finally time to cut out the circus you live in as a wilderness Christian? What ever happened to your intimate love relationship with Him?