Chapter Five
Step 5: “Admitted to God,
to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.”
Spiritual Law Five
Law of Non-Judgment
“We only judge that which we do not understand,
and if we don’t understand,
how accurate can our judgment be anyway.”
Wm. “Rahasya” Poe
The moment we admit to God, ourselves,
and another human being the nature of our wrongs, we have taken another step in
claiming our power back. It’s been said
that, “confession is good for the soul.” I think we’ve all experienced the
relief that’s felt after we’ve cleared the air with a confession.
In the “Course of Miracles” they
say to get up and say, “Today, I will not Judge anyone or anything.”[i] This
is where the “Law of Non-Judgment” is indispensable, because when you judge
something in yourself or others, you are firmly based in your ego, and this
leads to a form of pride that will eventually blind you. Ultimately, you will
end up sometimes judging people and events merely to justify why you are
judging.
I have seen people get hung-up
here by getting into admitting “what” they did wrong, when the emphasis should
be on “why,” hence “the nature of our wrongs.” As a matter of fact, I have been
to meetings where some have gone on and on about all the “things” they have done
wrong and completely bypassed the “nature” of those wrongs.
If You Can Feel It, You Can Heal
It
As
thinking beings, we love to get immersed into thoughts about our lives, our
actions, and even our feelings. In other words, we love drama. But, when it comes
to feelings, we shouldn’t confuse the “Map for the Territory.” When we start
doing Step 5, we are going to uncover feelings that have been buried for some
time. It will be tempting to just talk about the action involved, or if we do
get close to the feeling, say something like, “I think I feel angry.” To start the healing process, you need to do
much more than ‘think’ you ‘feel’ anger. You need to ‘feel it,’ own it, and
eventually transform it. Remember, “if you can feel it, you can heal it,” you
could even say that “feeling it, is healing it.”
When
you work Step 5, think of it as “taking out the trash.” Don’t judge it or
rationalize it, just dump it. Don’t get me wrong, go into the feelings, but you
can do it in such a way that you can easily let go of them. This is another
Step where the meditation is indispensable. As a matter of fact, I can honestly
say that for me, without meditation, this Step would be nothing more than empty
words.
Be Compassionate With Yourself
and Others
It’s
important to realize that compassion comes about when we view the world
non-judgmentally. We are so used to
seeing a world that is polarized into right and wrong, good and bad, and it’s
further reinforced by our senses because they (our senses) tell us that there
is up and down, right and left, etc. In some of the writings from the Nag
Hammadi Library, it’s stated this way, “--When you make the two one, and when
you make the inside like the outside and the outside like the inside, and the
above like the below, and when you make the male and female one and the
same--then will you enter the Kingdom of my Father--” It also goes on to say that
this is when you say to the mountain, “move” and the mountain moves.
It
may also be worth noting that in recent research,[ii]
the emotions of appreciation and compassion produces effects on the body that
significantly affect the cardiovascular system in a positive way. Also in a
paper titled, “The Physiological and Psychological Effects of Compassion and
Anger,” they found that compassion significantly increases antibodies, while
anger decreases them.[iii]
So
while you are admitting the exact nature of your wrongs, remember to give
yourself a little credit and don’t pass judgment on yourself or others.
Be Ye As a Child--Again
I know this may be difficult, but for a moment, let go of
your beliefs (don’t worry, if they’re true, they will be there when you get
back). Now think back to when you were young.
Did you judge others and hold them in contempt because they didn’t live
up to your expectations? Did you live in fear of a capricious God frowning down
on you waiting to punish you for your evil sins? Or did you live life amazed
with its wonder, easily forgiving those that hurt you and always seeing the
beauty in life. Our beliefs are the outcome of what we have learned over the
years from parents, friends, and of course, the church. It’s easy to see that
we have learned to judge primarily because we feel that we are being judged.
This, in turn, adds to the separation we feel from God because we fear his
judgment. Then, of course, there’s the aspect of judging others merely to make
ourselves feel better.
How many times have we seen those who shout righteousness
fall from the very thing they’re shouting about? We tend to judge in others the
very thing that we need to heal in ourselves. So, while you’re admitting the
exact nature of your wrongs, remember to give yourself a little credit and
don’t pass judgment on yourself or others.
As a final word on this
subject, know this, how you see God is to a large degree how you see yourself.
If you see Him sitting in judgment, you will be into self-judgment, if you see
Him sitting on a thrown as a dictator, then you will see yourself as powerless
and disconnected from Him. The truth tends to be simple, and to the degree you
experientially know this, your life will become better: “You are ONE with God.”
